A Mama on a Mission

Papa, where are you going with that axe?

2008-07-29T10:50:00.000-07:00

Did you think I ran away from home?
No, but I almost axed this blog.
We went on a beach vacation (so fun) with a luau party at the end.
We've been taking daily swimming lessons.
We had a big Fancy Nancy birthday bash for Sister's 4th birthday.
We've been doing lots of art.
We've just been enjoying summer.

And I REALLY didn't miss writing here.
But... I'm not going to give it up yet, I don't think. Though I might be making some changes.
In any case, I won't be back here until about the third week of August when the kids start preschool. So, cheerio! And I hope you are having a TERRIFIC summer!

PS- Do you know which book opens with the sentence that is my "title" today?

Fancy Nancy, I love you.

2008-07-09T14:29:00.000-07:00

My friends, are you familiar with Fancy Nancy? If not, you must aquaint yourself at once. Especially if you have a little girl.
Fancy Nancy is all the rage at our house, and is the theme of Sister's upcoming 4th birthday party. I have ordered a dozen tutus, feather boas, tiaras, and pixie wings. (From this source- good prices!) We will be dressing up, painting little nails, putting on make-up (or, rather, making a big deal out of putting on VERY LITTLE make-up) and doing a necklace-making craft. Then we will have "tea" of sandwiches with little frilly toothpicks, mini muffins, fruit cut into fancy shapes, and a very fancy cake. Doesn't it sound divine?
(If I survive, I'll post photos.)
Anway, the above photo is what I've been working on for the past two evenings- homemade invitations. I had a ball! I almost didn't post the photo because it doesn't BEGIN to capture the glimmery, glittered FANCINESS of this creation. (Have you noticed this theme lately? My rental house is just DARK- and even the yard is dark and shadowed- I took that photo outside!) I color-copied the Nancy from one of Sister's books onto cardstock, attached her with 3-D glue dots onto another sheet of cardstock printed with the party info., and then drew the butterflies and flowers. I painted them with a lovely watercolor paint that has a subtle shimmer, and then I got rid of all pretext of subtlety and heaped glitter on Nancy's wings and the Prima flowers. SO fun!
Sister is quite enchanted, and so excited about her party. But first we have our luau next Friday night while we're out at the beach! We're party people these days.

Zuccanoes- yummy,healthy, and filling!

2008-07-08T11:31:00.001-07:00

Pardon this photo. My zuccanoes look like they've been sitting under a heat lamp for 30 minutes. Actually, they were fresh out of the oven and quite visually appealing- but when you live in a poorly lit house your nighttime photography options are limited.

After hearing so much about the New Moosewood Cookbook, I decided to check it out from the library and see if it is for me. I will admit that not all the recipes appeal to me, but this one looked good. And it was! And so healthy too! I was getting ready to type the recipe here, when I realized it's already on Mollie Katzen's website. So, click here to get it! Aren't I just the efficient one?

(As if!)

If anyone else has any recipes from this cookbook that they recommend, please do let me know.

2008-07-03T09:00:00.000-07:00

Have you ever heard of the Story People by Brian Andreas? If not, go check it out. Somewhere in California a group of diverse people gather together and create prints, wall hangings, and unique furniture pieces that have a really vibrant, artistic flair. I've pasted a photo or two here to show you examples (from their website.) Each one includes a "story" written by Brian Andreas- it's actually more like short prose that suggests a longer story. I love the idea of their enterprise- it's my idea of heaven to be in a studio with a group of interesting and talented people creating ART. So cool.

One night a few years ago I was up late, in a whimsical mood, and I got on a kick reading his "stories" online. (There is a place on the website where you can read them.) Some of my favorites are:

Ancient Kings

Angel of Dreams (PS- The Susan who commented there is not me, FYI.)

Oh, goodness. (There are so many more I love, but that's enough links for now.)

On that night, a few years ago, I was so inspired by these stories that I wrote some of my own. Here's are a few:

Art

Why does art exist he asked and the angel said because there are not enough words to hold all the possibilities of the human heart.

Light

Have you ever noticed, remarked one star to another, that humans are so busy creating their own light that they no longer notice the light God has provided them?

Little Girls

Why do little girls like pink he asked and the little girl answered because pink is what you get when you mix red hot fire with cool white snow and that is exactly what girls are anyway.

Perfect Medicine

Of course if we could bottle the essence of a baby’s laugh and give it as a tonic we wouldn’t need doctors or hospitals or nurses anymore, now would we?

I wrote these two when I was experiencing infertility and WISHING my heart out for children:

Daughters

Will I ever have a daughter? I asked the angel and she laughed and said surely someone who loves starlight and deep forests and sunset skies as much as you do will have a daughter, because daughters are born of these things.

Sons
Will I ever have a son? I asked the angel and he laughed and said surely someone who loves clear mountains and thunderclouds and the roar of the sea as much as you do will have a son, because sons are born of these things.

I had fun writing those, and fun tonight revisiting them. Check out the Story People website if you're in the mood for some inspiration.

Reading any good books? I am!

2008-07-02T18:41:00.001-07:00

Well, I went MIA without planning on it. But in between my last post and tonight, we took a four-day trip to visit my Grandma, had swimming lessons (Sister, to be precise), and hosted playgroup (which involves a LOT of cleaning... before and after!) So, it's been busy. And we've also just been enjoying summer. I've been logging on a good bit less these past weeks, and that's a good thing sometimes.

One of the perks is that when I do go to read my favorite blogs, there is a lot of new stuff! Fun!

Rather than share lots of little anecdotes from life (not in the mood tonight), I'll give you a few book reviews.

Here are some good books we recently checked out from our library: (The cover images are from Amazon.com)

The Circus is Coming by Hilary Knight

This one is a classic, but the new edition is printed in rich color on glossy paper and it's fabulous. Depicting fantastic scenes from a circus parade, Sister can pore over these illustrations for hours.

Peter Spier's Circus!

Another classic! If you've never seen this book, it's a must. I love Peter Spier's super-detailed illustrations (so much to see!) This book really shows circus from start to finish, from setting up the tent and seeing that the circus performers are real people with families to seeing the spectacle of the performance.

Toy Boat by Randall de Seve

This is a sweet story of a little boy and his homemade toy boat. They are best friends, but one day the boat gets tired of being restrained by the string and decides to go out sailing on its own. Of course, the sea is a big, scary place and in the end, the boat just wants to be back with his boy. Happy ending!

Ladybug Girl by Davis Doman and Jacky Davis

This is a cute one. It's starts with a little girl standing in a pile of discarded costumes, enjoying her "ladybug girl" reflection in the mirror. (Reminds me of Sister from page one!)

What I like most about this book is that the message is about learning to entertain oneself. Lulu (aka Ladybug Girl) has "nothing to do"- said while standing in a room FULL of toys. (Sound familiar?) Her parents stand firm, however, and require her to fill her own time. In the end, she does so in traditional childhood style- walking through the yard, imagining heroic scenarios, rescuing ants from a rock, etc. It's definitely worth a library check-out.

The Littlest Mayryoshka by Corinne Demas Bliss

What a wonderful story! A Russian doll-maker makes six matryoshka dolls but the littlest is knocked to the ground before they are sold. Her "sisters" are sold to a little girl but can't stop worrying about their littlest sister. Meanwhile, the littlest doll has quite a traveling adventure (reminded me of the steadfast tin soldier.) Fortunately, there is a very happy ending. A sweet story of sisterly love and reunion.

I'm still playing along with Jade's Expose Yourself challenge. But I'm waiting on some "after" pictures. (Plenty of "before" shots, don't you know!!)

I'll try not to be gone another week before I post again. But, hey, it's summer, so if I don't do my homework, who cares?

Sister's "Big Girl" Room Makeover

2008-06-25T10:53:00.001-07:00

Well, she's almost 4 years old. I guess it's time to transition from the crib to a bed.

No kidding! Sister still sleeps in her crib- quite happily too. But she's getting so big, and has noticed that all her friends have "big girl" beds, and has started talking about it, so... off we go.

The good news is that we already have a bed for her. It's my cousin's iron daybed (with a trundle) from 20 years ago. My DH always hated it- it looked old and dingy and had these tacky gold finials on top of the posts. But I talked him into just giving it a fresh coat of paint (finials included) and seeing what he thought then.

Here it is undergoing it's new paint job: (I know, I know... spray paint is terrible for the environment, but it's the best option for painting a bed like this. DH's vacation time is limited!)

The bed used to be cream (with a lovely overcoat of grime and dirt), but we decided to change the color to a light pink. It turned out perfectly!

Bedding was next. My mom offered to pay for any costs associated with the new bed (bless her!) so I logged onto the Pottery Barn Kids website. Of course, I loved so many of the bedding collections, but I chose this one:

Isn't it sweet? It's called "French Rose." I loaded up my cart: a comforter, duvet cover, sheet set, and three pillow shams. Then I went to check out. After taxes and shipping the total came to $348.00!!!

I just couldn't do it. I know my Mom is paying, but I just couldn't let myself spend that kind of money on BEDDING for my kid. (*For those of you who have spent that kind of money on your kid's bed, please don't feel judged. I spend PLENTY of money on other things, believe me.)

So, I loaded the kids into the van and made a Target run. I found a lovely Shabby Chic quilt with matching sheets- yay! I was worried at first when all I could see from the end of the aisle was commercialized Disney stuff. (DH would NOT approve.) I ended up buying the quilt, two sets of sheets, curtains, and a lamp- for $100 less than the bedding alone from Pottery Barn.

And the more I look at the Target set, the more I love it.

I'll be sure to post a photo when the bed is put together.

Edited to Add: I popped in over at Jade's blog and saw that doing lots of cleaning out, decluttering, and re-decorating, just like me! So, I'll be playing along with her Exposing Myself theme for a while. Do join us.

Problem

2008-06-24T10:45:00.000-07:00

Does anyone else have this problem?

I will be washing dishes, or wiping a bottom, or sorting through laundry, when I think of something JUST FABULOUS to write on this blog. Sometimes I laugh out loud at how funny my post will be- sometimes I'll think of words so poignant I'll find a little tear in my eye.
A topic will jump out at me, or even a cool idea for a series of entries. And I'll think, "Yes! That is just the thing for the blog! Don't forget!"

I always forget. ALWAYS!
I sit down here and every witty word, every expository narritive, every uplifting message just drains away...

Yesterday I swore to myself that I am going to keep a little notebook on my person AT ALL TIMES to help me overcome this difficulty. But I have to remember to buy one first.
It's not looking hopeful.

I'm back!

2008-06-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

Hi friends- hope you are all well. We had a great trip to the beach but I must say I'm always glad to get back home!
When I got back to Internet access (Hallelujah!) I was really saddened to read on Beck's blog that Tasha Tudor had passed away. I feel that I should write a long post about how much I admired her lifestyle, and how I loved her art, and how much she inspired me with all her ideas for making childhood magical for her children... but Beck said it so well already. So, if you haven't read her post on the subject yet, please do.
I shall now link you to a few things I am liking tonight:
1. These adorable little fairies from Etsy.
2. The stuff in Fairy Dreamer's Etsy shop- what inspiration!
3. Colored Kleen Kanteens! I haven't yet made the switch from poisonous plastic sippy-cups to the non-poisonous variety, and why the heck not??? It's time to get off my duff and do it, and these cool ones are just the right motivation!
4. This post featuring summer recipes on a newly discovered recipe blog. It looks spectacular. And she has a huge gluten-free index, Beck! Yippee!
5. The recipe archive on the Niki Leigh website- a company that specializes in creating homemade beauty products from natural ingredients. If I had an older daughter, I think we could have a fabulous girl-night with friends mixing up some of these concoctions and beautifying ourselves!
Hope you all have a great weekend!

Final Installment! More Ideas for Toddler Days: Part 5

2008-06-14T07:12:00.000-07:00

Here is the final installment of ideas and activities for your toddler. This will conclude the list. (we're to 100! Woo hoo!) Don't forget to visit Beth's original list of 50 Mood Changers for Toddler Days, found on her wonderful blog, Write, Mama, Write. (She's actually on a little break right now while she remodels a house, but check back with her because she's just super.)

41. Mystery Bag or box- For this activity you need an empty bag (fabric bags work best) or box with a hole cut into the side. The idea is that a child will reach in and feel an object without seeing it. There are several ways to play: you can put in an object and see if child can guess what it is OR put in several matching objects, have child pull one out and then go back in and try to feel for the match (can do with fabric swatches too in a shoebox) note: with younger toddlers, show them the objects as you put them into the bag and only use a few. With older kids, put in familiar objects but don’t show them prior. You could also collect some objects and make matching photo cards. Show your child a card and see if they can reach in and pull out the object without looking.
92. Model pretend play- Sometimes we expect children to play without realizing that having your toy bear talk to your toy doll is actually a rather strange idea. Once you model it, they'll take the idea and zoom off (if they are ready developmentally) but the trick is planting the idea. The important thing about this activity is that the adult thinks out loud. For example, you might say, "I want to make a zoo so I need to build some cages for the animals. Hmmm... I think I'll use some of these low blocks for that. Hey, this block would make a good tall cage- that one can be for the giraffe!" Also, draw your child in with questions, "What else do we see at the zoo? Oh, a restaurant! Good idea! What could we use to build that? Yes, that shoebox will work great. Hey! Let's get some little food out of the dollhouse to use in our zoo restaurant!" Do you see what I mean? Research actually shows that this kind of adult modeling can enhance creativity in children's play. I'm not saying that you need to do this every day. (Not should you!) Rather, try doing it occassionally to stretch your child's creativity and give them new ideas. Some of the fun things to model for them:
- Playing house, cooking in their pretend kitchen, playing with the dolls in the dollhouse, "feeding" the stuffed animals and babies, having their toys "talk" to each other, mixing and mingling toy sets (i.e. the dollhouse family inviting the Polly Pocket gals to tea),
93. Homemade sound bingo- Discovery Toys sells a Bingo game that comes with a CD full of sounds. Kids match the sounds they hear to the photos on the cards. It occurred to me that you don't have to buy the game to play this with your toddler. Draw a tic-tac-toe type of board on a sheet of white paper and draw or cut and paste photos of the following:
cow, rooster, sheep, snake, fire engine, car, clock, baby crying, singer, wind, a person sneezing, a person yawning, a person coughing, a person laughing, (Or any other ideas you think of. You could do lots of different animals.) Then give your toddler some small squares of cardstock to cover the pictures and start making the sounds! That's right, Mom takes the place of the CD player. With toddlers, it works best to keep playing until they cover the board.
94. Felt board on the wall- When we went on a road trip last summer, we stopped at the Children's Museum in Richmond, VA. It was FABULOUS. If you can ever take your kids there, please do. In the toddler room they had a big felt board hanging on a wall. Sister was mesmerized (she wasn't yet three at the time) and she wanted to stay at that board the whole time we were there, taking the little felt shapes and people on and off again. We ended up buying a lap felt board for the rest of our trip which entertained her for hours. Now we have one hanging on her wall, and she and brother play with it all the time. We keep the little flannel characters in a basket nearby. (Do a google search for flannel board or felt board and you'll find lots of sources- Ebay is a good source too.) You can also create homemade shapes, letters, and people if you want to get crafty, and if you don't want to hang a flannelboard on the wall, you can always just make a large one that can be put away. An easy and inexpensive solution would be to cover a piece of foam core with a yard or two of felt and prop it up somewhere when your kids want to play. I like a light blue background color because it works as sky or water (and doesn't show as much dirt as white.)
95. Get out fresh magnets for the fridge - As with everything, too much is too much. I've learned to store my magnets in sets in small boxes or bags and let them take our one or two at a time. When the fridge is too cluttered with magnets, they don't play well with them or they all just end up on the floor or strewn around the house. I also don't store and papers or photos on the bottom half of the fridge because it is a play area. (Note- if you have one of those annoying fridges that aren't magnetic (I used to!), just get out a few cookie sheets and let them play on those. I LOVE this idea from Family Fun and it's on my to-do list!
96. Buy a Bounce House- OK. I know. They're expensive. But, people, listen to me! There are some things that are worth the money. For example, it is often hard to spend a lot of money for a nice sofa or mattress, but when you figure out how much you use it and how much it would cost per day over the years, it's worth it! Same goes for the bounce house/ jump castle. For over a year I watched the neighbor kids jumping in their Little Tikes bounce house EVERY DAY on the back porch. I wanted one for my kids but the price (almost $200 for a nice-sized one) was off-putting. I finally broke down and bought one for Brother's birthday party (instead of spending that much to have it at Gymboree.) I can already tell that the $169.00 I spent on that jump house is going to be WELL worth it. The kids play in it constantly. (The key is to have it somewhere accessible, like the corner of a playroom, rather than storing it in the back of a closet.) It saves rainy days, cold days, hot days, days when we have too much energy in the late afternoon, etc. I highly recommend this as a sanity-saving toy. Note: You do need to keep an eye on them while they're playing in a jump house. I've prevented MANY near-injuries just by being vigilant about monitoring what they're doing in there. PS- It's WAY overpriced on Amazon!!
97. Household hunt- make photo cards of basic household objects. Give each kid one card at a time and have them go find that item and bring it back to you (or put into a basket.) ideas: pot, doll, stuffed friend, toy car, sock, diaper, book, etc. (Older kids could do this as a race- give each kid a stack of cards, a bag, and see who can finish the fastest. Then time them to see how fast they can put their stuff back. If you keep time, you can make time the enemy and see if they can do it again and beat their time.)
98. Chugga Chugga Choo Choo- This is one of Brother's favorite books. It is the story of a little toy train that chugs through a boy's room. (He has created a very imaginative track using his toys.) It has inspired us to create our own fun "track" out of toys that winds through the den and take Brother's Thomas trains for a little spin. This is an activity I still have to help with (a lot) but I know I am planting a seed of creativity: one day Brother will create these imaginative tracks all on his own!
99. Happy Toilet Paper Trails...- I saw this one on the Family Fun website. You take a roll of toilet paper and wind it all through the house- around table legs, up stairs, into closets and out again, etc. and have your toddler follow it from beginning to end. It's always fun to have a little treat at the end, like a cookie or a sheet of stickers. Then, make it a game to go backwards and collect all the toilet paper. Is it wasteful? Not if you use it the next day to make Clean Mud! (See # 100 of this post.)
100. Clean Mud - Take a large, shallow pan or a big bowl (a dishpan is a nice size) and into it grate one bar of white Ivory soap. Let your toddler tear a roll of toilet paper into small bits (as small as possible- you might want to go behind him and tear up any big pieces) and add it into the pan. Then pour in warm water (warm so the soap can dissolve) and mix until you get a nice fluffy texture. It should feel like thick Cool Whip. Too much water makes it too soupy. This is a fun one to play with, and it smells great!

Bonus: Costume jewelry- When I was a little girl, one of my favorite things to do was go through my grandmother's "junk jewelry." (This was her costume stuff that is actually fairly collectible today.) She gave it to me in lovely old jewelry case with lots of compartments and drawers, and I've added a few of my own "junky" pieces to it. My kids love to sort through it all, identifying each item, asking me to recall the origin of each item. Beyond the obvious appeal of going through and handling each piece, a cache of jewelry has so many possiblities for creative play. It can be a pirate's treasure, a source for the dress-up closet, a mermaid's secret box, etc. Just one IMPORTANT NOTE: I don't let them play with the jewelry box out of my sight. (Not until they're much older, at least.) I read an article about a little girl who swallowed a cheap metal charm from one of those freebie necklaces that come with toys and she died of lead poisioning within a week. Not knowing what metals are in old jewelry, I do two things: 1) I don't let them play with it unless I'm paying attention to them and 2) I took out all the items that were made only of metal and kept the plastic, beaded, and wooden pieces. However, you still have to be careful about not letting them mouth things because there are still little metal clamps, jump rings, etc. Not to mention that almost all jewelry is a choking hazard. Still, if you're there with them, they love to sort through the jewelry, especially if they're feeling under the weather. It's a nice sick-day activity. Just please WATCH them!!

So, there you have it. 50 more ideas. Put them with Beth's and it's 100. Add in the ideas you find in Blogland and it's even more! I hope it helps you have some fun times with your kiddos!

Whew! I'm pooped- that was a lot of blogging!
I'm going on a little beach trip this week so I'll be gone until Friday. Have a great week everyone!!

Buried...

2008-06-13T11:32:00.001-07:00

Help. We're cleaning out the garage today. It's bad; really bad. I'm not going to get to my final installment of toddler/preschooler activities today, but I'll be back this weekend with the final ten.
Hope you're having more fun than I am today!

Ideas for Toddler Days: Part 4

2008-06-12T10:00:00.000-07:00

Here is the fourth set of ideas to help survive (and thrive) during toddler days. Click here to see
Introduction and 1-10
11-20
21-30
***NOTE: I have some photos I wanted to drop in here and there, but my computer is being DIFFICULT and I want to get this posted today. Hopefully I can drop them in later, so check back.

31. Felt faces - I bought a toy at a dollar store for Sister one day that inspired this game. It was made of vinyl stickers and little cardboard faces that were blank. The idea was that you put the vinyl stickers (various types of eyes, noses, mouths, ears, etc.) on the cardboard pieces to make silly faces. The kids loved it, but the pieces were so small that they were lost quickly. I decided to recreate the game in felt, and it's been a big hit. (A good travel toy, too.)
32. Prop boxes - Those of you with early childhood education in your background will have already heard of "prop boxes." A prop box is a collection of objects, books, toys, etc. that support a central theme. For example, we have a "Doctor Kit" prop box. Inside you will find our pretend medical instruments in a doctor bag, a set of scrubs, several ace bandages, two picture books about going to the doctor, a digital thermometer that doesn't really work, a small flashlight, and some old CT scans of Mommy's brain. Other prop boxes at our house are the beauty parlor prop box and a pet shop prop box (a good thing to do with the surplus stuffed animals.) The beauty of prop boxes is that they promote creative play and support organization. Before we started our Doctor Prop Box, the toy medical instruments were strewn all over the house, making it very hard to play doctor. The box also makes the toys more novel, since they aren't out all the time. I store our prop boxes up in my closet- the kids know where they are and can request them, but the fact that they're not always out makes them MUCH more interesting! Check out this site for more ideas. This site has tons too- choose a letter of the alphabet to see lots of ideas! It's great on a rainy day to have a "fresh" box of toys to bring out and offer the kids, "Hey! Let's play pet shop!" :-)
33. Do some yoga: I will admit, I'm not really the yoga type. But when Sister's preschool teacher started teaching her some yoga for kids, I was amazed at how quickly she picked it up. Her teacher sent home a "yoga for kids" booklet, and we've been having fun trying out all the poses. Brother is pretty good too! (And it gets Mommy off her tush and doing a little exercise.)Here is a great book (especially for preschoolers.) These two are good for babies and toddlers. Check your library!
34. Play grocery store with stuff from the pantry - There are some days when my kids simply MUST be near me no matter what. The magnetic Mommy forces cannot be defeated. It's hardest when I'm trying to cook supper but I've learned one way to cope. I open the pantry door and let them play grocery store. They get out boxes and cans and set them up nearby, shop, ring themselves out, and bag them up. A toy cash register and toy buggy would probably make it even better. To bad we don't have those! The one thing I've learned to hard way is to store the heavy cans and jars up high where they can't reach. Smashed toddler toes are NOT a good thing.
35. Create a “cave” in a closet. Bring in “supplies” like snacks, blankets, etc. Bring in stuffed animals and dolls, read stories with flashlight. Make S'mores in the microwave. You could also do a mermaid or pirate cove this way and add some blue fabric or sheets to the floor to indicate “water.” White Christmas lights add a magical effect.
36. Shadow/light play - Are you familiar with the Reggio Emilia approach to early childhood education? If not, read about it here on Wikipedia. I am fascinated with many of the concepts that have come from this movement that was founded in Italy after World War II. One of the ideas I've gained from reading about Reggio Emilia is the use of a light table as a sensory exploration tool for young children. Just look at this photo and you'll see what I mean. We don't have a light table (a little out of our price range) but we do have an old overhead projector. (Surplus from the school district.) The children love to play with objects on the lit top of the projector such as transparent and translucent items (you can find things especially for overheads at a teacher store) as well as flat-bottomed glass beads, etc. It's also fun to draw with Vis-A-Vis markers on the glass. The added bonus of the overhead projector is that it also offers an element of shadow play because it projects images on the wall. We just got ours a few months ago but I have big plans for some shadow-puppet plays too! PS- Check out this photo and see why I love Reggio Emilia. Such beautiful environments!
37. Make a list of places to go so you don’t have to think on your feet if you’re tired, frustrated, etc. and need a change of scenery. Post it on your fridge. My list includes Grandma's house, Target, Barnes and Noble, a variety of parks around town, the farmer's market (on certain days), the museum, the toy store, a bakery, my husband's school (after hours), etc. You wouldn't think you'd need such a list, but the truth is that tired moms can use all the helpful reminders possible. Without such a list, I get into a rut.
38. Watch home movies - So many of us beat ourselves up over letting our kids watch tv. (I do!) Even though I limit the quantity, I still wish I could get rid of tv time altogether. But the reality for me is that there are times I simply NEED tv: when I'm sick, when they're sick, when it's been cold and raining for 3 days straight, etc. I recently discovered a happy medium: home movies! We have a video camera that hooks up to the tv and the kids LOVE watching shows that feature them! Birthdays! Christmases! Sweet little moments from baby-hood! They love it all, and I feel better about it because our home movies lack the over-stimulating, brain-numbing quality found in most modern television programming for kids. This is not to say that we never watch an episode of Sesame Street anymore, but I have been able to phase some of that out and replace it with something much more authentic and meaningful for our family.
39. Fruity Art: Sister went through a Strawberry Shortcake phase as a toddler (and actually never left the phase.) She loves dolls, and those sweet little dolls that also smell good really tickle her fancy. One day I remembered a craft I had done with kindergartners several years ago and thought it would be perfect for Sister. We were going to make our own Strawberry Shortcake paper dolls! First, we drew several "dolls" on heavy white cardstock and colored them. (Actually, we painted them with watercolors, but you could color them any way you like.) Next, I put out little bowls of scented Kool-Aid powders in various flavors/colors. I helped Sister put Elmer's glue on each doll and then we sprinkled a powder on top of each doll (like glitter.) After we shook off the extra, we let them dry. Sister had a BLAST playing with her "Strawberry Shortcake" dolls, and later we turned one or two into necklaces (punched a hole in it and tied it on a piece of yarn.) This activity was a BIG hit, and could be used with any type of drawing- not just "dolls."
40. Get inspired by a children’s artist- There are so many fabulous children's illustrators out there today. You can create an amazing art activity just by mimicking some of these illustrators. A favorite example is Eric Carle. When I taught elementary school, I used to do a little unit on him where we read lots of his books and then created our own collages based on his techniques. The skinny of it is that you 1)Create lots of beautiful papers with paint and lots of fun objects such as brushes, stamps, scrapers, fingers, wads of saran wrap, etc.! 2)Then you come back another day and use those papers to create collages. See this website for a step-by-step explanation. (It's actually a lesson plan but don't be scared of that! A lesson plan is basically just a well-written set of directions!)

Only 10 left! See you tomorrow.

Ideas for Toddler Days: Part 3

2008-06-11T06:24:00.000-07:00

Here are the next 10 ideas for toddler days with your little one. Click here to read the explanation and see the first ten ideas. Click here for the second ten.
And now here is 21-30!

21. Play your own version of Bubby Ball- While I think it is probably impossible to accurately describe the rules and play of “Bubby Ball", the general idea is that it involves a soft, bouncy ball, some laundry baskets, and a lot of made-up, nonsense rules. Yes, the DH invented this (of course.) Currently the rules are that Brother sits in his chair in his room and tries to throw the ball into one of the baskets. When he makes it, his Dad screams “Rats!” When he misses, his Dad screams, “Miss!” and throws it back to him. And when he purposely throws it into the closet, his Dad tickles him silly. All boy nonsense, of course. Brother LOVES it. Sister loves it too. (Of course there are additional rules added when Sister is in the mix.) Bubby Ball is one of our top “the toddler is in a bad mood” survival strategies. This type of nonsense game gets everyone laughing and burning energy, and it works for all ages. My DH has vivid childhood memories of playing just this type of game outside with his brother with balls, catcher’s protective gear, a shovel, and a hole dug in the dirt. He says they spent hours playing that made-up ball game. (Boys- what silly creatures!) Anyway, the point is that you can create silly games of this genre with a little creativity and a dose of silliness. In fact, the sillier the rules, the better.
22. Puffy sticker play- I'm sure you're aware of the fun your toddler can have with some stickers. But puffy stickers are the best for toddlers because they are easy to take off the sheet and can be taken on and off an object numerous times. My kids especially love to stick them to a window. (Note: vinyl stickers like Colorforms work great on windows too!) Puffy stickers cost a bit more, but I like to keep a few packs up on a shelf in the playroom where I can pull them out when I need 10 minutes of peace to cook some dinner!
23. Whip up a batch of shaving cream paints. This doesn't sound that great, but it is! Buy a canister of old-fashioned white shaving cream (it's cheap!) and then mix up a few bowls following these guidelines: mix white glue (like Elmer's) with an equal amount of shaving cream. Add a few drops of food coloring and mix well. Do this several times until you have as many colors as you desire. Then paint away! This paint is fun to work with and dries with a cool, fluffy texture. (Therefore, it makes great clouds, snow, etc.) We use brushes, fingers, tongue depressors, scrapers, etc. Last time we painted on paper, but next time I'm going to try it on foil and see what happens. Make sure your child doesn't eat any of this paint!
24. Get out of your house! I know, this isn't really a big idea. But the truth is that sometimes what everyone needs is some fresh air and a change of scenery. So, here are some suggestions for getting out and about:
- Go on a color hunt
- Go exploring
- "Feed" your yard fairies - What? You didn't know fairies live in your yard? Well, they do. And if you leave little bits of things fairies like to eat (ours like a mixture of oatmeal and silver glitter) then they leave little treats on your doorstep. Things like special rocks and shells, or a small box of pretty leaves, or even a little sweet. (It depends on how nice you are to them.) And there is always a little bit of fairy dust (clear micro glitter) on the ground near the gift. Just try it and see!
- Go to a green field (recreation fields work well if not in use), take some balls, and run!
- Go for a walk in another part of town. We get bored with our neighborhood and like to drive to another area of town for an afternoon walk. Lately we've been visiting one neighborhood in particular that has beautiful homes, wide sidewalks, and a great park. When the DH has had a stressful day, this is one of his favorite things to do as a family. We get exercise, and the kids enjoy the stroller ride (and the park play.)
- Bored with your park? Try adding a fun new element, like big bubbles, or letting your toddler push her doll there in a doll stroller, or taking a bag of books there to read. A mini-picnic is always a good idea at a park, especially if you can eat it at the top of the play equipment.
- Go outside to do a traditionally indoor activity. Examples: color or paint outside, read outside, play with toys outside (like blocks or the dollhouse)
- Set up an obstacle course for the kids. Here are some of the things on our course: kick the ball, step through hula hoops, fill a bucket with bean bags, and hit the baseball off the tee. Then run back to the start as fast as you can.
OK- I guess it's not so much an obstacle course as it is a course of things to do! For older children, you can add an outside enemy: time! See if they can beat their time each time they complete the course.
-Wash the car. On nice-weather days, this is fun, wet, and actually fairly productive! Kids love to feel like they're "helping" do a grown-up task, especially if it involves sponges and buckets of sudsy water.
25. Bust out the body crayons/ paint- What is so magical about face paint? I'm not sure, but I know that my kids LOVE getting their faces painted at craft fairs and festivals. It inspired me to get these books, which have been a BIG hit around here. I like this one with pencils and this one with paint.
26. Visit this great website. - I already shared a list of links to great activities from Blogland. But I didn't mention this site, which deserves its own bullet: The Artful Parent. One afternoon sit down with a cup of tea and pursue the archives of this site. You will find some great projects that are just perfect for toddlers!
27. Another site: The next blog that is bullet-worthy is The Crafty Crow. She did something I dreamed of doing (but never got around to, of course.) When she sees a great craft, project, or recipe for kids that she wants to remember, she posts it on this blog. It's relatively new, but already jam-packed with great stuff. Once again, peruse all those older posts and jot down/ print out your favorite ideas for a rainy day. This activity saved me one nasty day. It rocked.
28. Silly toddler game: Stuffed Friends Toss- Put your toddler in their crib or bed. Then sit on the floor (or across the room) and throw their stuffed animals, one by one, onto their bed. My kids like to throw them back, and it becomes a competition to see who can win the battle. My kids also enjoy playing stuffed friend basketball into a laundry basket from inside a crib. And then, you can't beat "Bury the toddler with stuffed friends until you can only see their little face." Even Brother will stay still for that one!
29. Play Beauty Parlor - For the relatively inexpensive price of a beauty parlor set from a discount store, you can buy hours of beauty parlor fun. Sister can spend some serious time this way- her favorite items are a doll beauty chair (bought from Target) and a toy hair dryer (that sounds like the real thing when turned on.) Add some hair do-dads, some make-up brushes, some combs, and some pretend make-up and you've got yourself some big fun. And don't think this is just for girls. Boys love this too, to the point that when Sister shared this at school, the boys didn't want to go outside. They wanted to stay in and play beauty parlor!!! Funny.
30. Bookmaking brainstorm - Beth gave the great idea to create a book by pasting down pictures and letting your child tell you what is in the picture while you write it down. It's a GREAT thing to do, not only as a literacy-builder, but because it affirms your child in a very unique way. It isn't surprising to me that our simple homemade books (especially those featuring family members) are by far the most cherished books in our house. Here are some of the approaches we've taken to creating books with the kids:
§ Language Experience Approach- with this approach, you write exactly what your child says and read it. (No correcting, or rewording.) It is quite empowering for children, and helps them make the connection between the spoken word and print. Look here for more information on this approach.
§ Family photo book - One of my kids' favorite books is a simple photo book that has a photo of each family member per page and the name of that family member written underneath. They often want to sleep with this one!
§ Counting book- cut images from mags OR take photos with groupings of toys or objects- involve your child in choosing and setting up which toys/objects will be used. *The only trick is to take the photo so that all the objects can be clearly seen when the photo is printed.
§ Color book using photos - This is the same idea as above. Let your child choose objects around the house or yard that show different colors (group red things and take a photo, then blue, etc.) Brother was confusing some of his colors until we did this and now he's got it!
§ Word book- Again, similar to above, let your child choose the image and help you glue it down- then you write the word underneath. Keep these in page protectors in a binder and keep adding over time. You'd be amazed at how much this can help to improve their vocabulary!
§ Non-fiction- Use photos to create a book that tells about an event, such as a trip to the zoo, or a birthday party, or a typical day at school, etc. These books become very meaningful mementos and are much-requested read alouds.
§ Fiction: Coming soon to our house... fictional stories told through photos and words. Inspired by Amanda's post about her homemade pirate movie, I thought that we could use costumes and household props to retell some favorite stories, such as Cinderella. I'll plan out the events we need to capture in photographs, we'll stage them, photograph them, print them out, and then do a simple retelling before we bind it all up. Don't you think that would be awesome??? I do!

OK- back tomorrow with 31-40!

Ideas for Toddler Days: Part 2

2008-06-10T06:51:00.000-07:00

Here is the second installment of activities to do with toddlers (and older kids too.) See this post for an explanation and the first ten ideas.

11. Simple scavenger hunt - One of Brother's favorite books is Where's Spot? He loves to look for Spot the puppy behind all the flaps. That book gave me the idea to do a similar scavenger hunt with the stuffed friends in our house. We already have a Spot doll- lucky! So during naptime, I hide stuffed animals around the house with little clues(based on Where’s Spot?) When Brother wakes up and is ready to play, I'll say "That Spot! He hasn't eaten his lunch! Where can he be? Let's look!" Of course, I guide him to the first location (the tub, for instance) and he finds a stuffed friend with an index card that says, "No, look in the pantry!" (or the kitchen cabinet, or under the bed, or behind the couch, or in the shoe basket, etc.) Finally we find Spot (always exciting) and then Brother likes to feed him some crackers. It's a sweet little activity. (Note- when I'm too lazy to make index cards, I just prompt him to go to the next place verbally, "No? Let's look in the closet!" Now that he has the hang of it, he checks all the usual places without much prompting. This means I have to find new places to hide Spot or the game is over too soon!)
12. Have a parade- Throw on some dress-up clothes, grab some noisemakers or instruments, and start marching around the house. Toddlers don't need a big reason to parade. Their natural exuberance is always on the verge of a parade anyway! You can do this with just one child if you load up some dolls and stuffed friends into a wagon, stroller, etc. But it does work better with a few more kids or adults. Sometimes just getting siblings or a playmate to join the parade can make it more festive. You can have a generic parade any time or you can do a "special" parade. Here are some fun ones:

Chinese New Year parade: Make a Chinese dragon (you can make this as simple or complex as you like. It works well to make a "head" out of a box or even a paper plate and then attach a length of fabric with crepe paper streamers hanging off.) Add a drum and cymbal and you're a parade waiting to happen.
Wild Thing Rumpus: One of our favorite books is Where the Wild Things Are. If you make some wild thing masks, you can have a terrific rumpus of your own. This can be a parade or can just deteriorate into general silly behavior. A drum or two and some rhythm instruments help a lot. Here's a sample mask found on Flickr to inspire you. I neglected to photograph our masks when we made them (bad mommy!) but I'll do so the next time we decide to rumpus.
4th of July: This is not a new idea, of course. But it's a classic reason to parade. If you don't already participate in a parade, this is your chance! See if you can round up some friends and family for a parade. Decorate wagons, bikes, strollers, and yourself, and march on!
Birthday Parade: I love the idea of everyone getting dressed up in a silly way (covered in crepe paper, balloons, and a party hat) and parading the birthday child around the house and yard. Brother thought it was a FABULOUS way to start his 2nd birthday- definitely a new tradition in our house.

13. Sorting Box - Sister has always loved small things, so one day when I was at the craft store, I got inspired to create a "sorting box" for her. (Also could be a counting box.) I bought lots of little miniatures and put them together in a blue box. She and Brother both love it. Recently I added a sorting tray bought from this preschool source (awesome stuff, good prices) and it has added a new level to the sorting.
14. Play-Doh - OK. This is nothing new, and Beth even mentioned making homemade playdough on her list. But I will expand and tell you some of the things that have kept Brother and Sister interested: straws of various size and length, small birthday candles (they make birthday cakes and have little parties), coffee stirrers, clay molds, making imprints with shells and other plastic toys, forks, knives, doll footprints and animal tracks, etc., I thought this was a great idea too.
15. Print out ideas from your favorite blogs- There are SO many ideas out there; so many incredibly talented and creative people!!! But I've found that if I don't print out the idea promptly, I forget it. Or I remember it but forget where to find it. Or I remember where to find it but forget when, and spend an hour searching through blog archives. So now I've started an idea binder and I keep all the ideas, crafts, and recipes I want to try in one spot. Here are just a few of my favorites that live in my binder:
- Amy over at Inspire Co. is very, well, inspiring! I love her blog and all her ideas. I especially love this idea for Easter and this one for creating a magnet play area. You also need to see this room Amy designed/decorated for her foster children. She is just an amazing person!
- I love this idea for making stickers from Mary Beth's blog, Salt and Chocolate. She is so creative and crafty, even with her son going through treatment for Cancer. Look at these little books she made for her son to "write" in.-I simply must make these doll mermaid tails for some of Sister's dolls. (From Angry Chicken.)

- Kate's Thanksgiving table runner is a must for this fall. And the Easter one is so cute it hurts me.

And there are so many more! So start printing them out and saving them for yourself! (Obviously not for any copy-catting or commerial purpose, but I don't need to tell you that.)
16. Throw a surprise party for someone special - My kids are REALLY into parties right now. They love an occasion, and at their ages, it doesn't take much to make a humdrum afternoon into a party scene. It's fun to pick someone (like Daddy) and tell them that we're going to throw him a surprise party for being such a great Daddy (or Grandma because she has been under the weather), etc. Then we bust out the party bin and blow up balloons, hang streamers, etc. I usually have thought ahead enough to be prepared to whip up some cupcakes or cookies, and then we're ready to surprise our special person. Adding a few family members or friends gives it a special party feel. You can take it as far as you want, or be as simple as you want. You can also get creative and throw the party for an imaginary friend, stuffed animal, etc. Adding a game or craft makes it even better. Whether big or small, your little ones will think a party rocks.

17. Collage Caddy - Collage is such a great activity for young ones because it's so easy to do. All you need is something to glue on, some glue, and some things to glue down. There are hundreds of ideas out there (dried pasta, beans, seeds, leaves and flowers, torn paper, pictures from magazines, photographs, bits of fabric and trim, pom poms, sequins, stickers, cotton balls, ETC.!) Anyway, to make this an easy go-to activity I created a little collage caddy of materials so we could always make some art on the fly. All you need is glue (I prefer good old white Elmer's- I have NEVER been able to get glue sticks to work worth a hoot!), scissors (safety ones for little kids), and some materials. I like to keep it fresh, and change out the offerings on a fairly regular basis. I have also found that the front and back of a shirt box (or cereal box) are GREAT surfaces for collage. You can either cut off the sides or leave them on for the look of a stretched canvas.
18. Cardboard construction - OK. I'll admit that I haven't done this one yet, but it's high on the list of summer activities. I am gathering as much cardboard as possible- boxes of all sizes, toilet paper tubes, paper towel tubes, etc. along with lots of fastening things like masking tape, clear tape, electrical tape, duct tape, etc. and help my kids to construct something. These websites inspire me. (Though I am sure ours will look NOTHING like them and will more closely resemble a BIG BLOB.

19. Songs and rhymes: Being a former teacher, I have lots of songs, chants, and fingerplays in my repertoire. But, my "early-morning with little kids coma" often prevents me from thinking of them off the top of my head. I really wanted to try a "circle time" with my kids this summer, so I made a small flip book featuring our favorites. On each card I have the words and a coordinating photo or picture. I laminated them (at the DH's school- poaching the laminator!) and bound the cards with rings. Now we can flip through and choose our songs and rhymes easily. I will also tell you that this is an excellent activity to promote emerging literacy!
20. Activities with paint chips - One of my friends is homeschooling the Montessori way and she shared these great ideas. Go to the hardware store and snitch some paint chips. Start out by simply matching swatches- start with primary colors and have two of each chip. Next make a set with have primary plus orange, purple, green, pink, white, grey, brown, and black. Match those! Then, make a third set with varying shades of each color so the kids can put them in order from lightest to darkest. The more shades of each color you gather, the more complex this game gets. You can also play a game with these: give your child a color swatch and have them find an object of that color somewhere in the house (or outside.)

OK, back tomorrow with 21-30!

50 More Ideas for Toddler Days: Part 1

2008-06-09T09:12:00.000-07:00

I don't believe that I've ever mentioned her here before, but Beth over at Write, Mama, Write is one of my favorite bloggers. She is a former teacher now SAHM (like me) and has a toddler son (who is, I think, a tad older than Brother.) I appreciate all her musings about motherhood and admire her craftability. (If football announcers can make up words like "escapablity" and the like, so can I. Craftability. Oh calm down, spellcheck!)

Anyway, one of the first posts I saw on Beth's site thrilled me. It was titled 50 Mood Changers for Toddler Days and it is a WONDERFUL listing of ideas that will help you get through those long afternoons with a little one. (I will note that it's not just for toddlers- preschoolers will love it all too - and some work well for older kids- but it's special in that ALL of it works with toddlers, the most, er, challenging group.)
At the bottom of her post, Beth mentioned that she hoped to eventually compile a list of at least 100 ideas, but this list stopped at 50.
Since I first saw it, I've referred to the list time and again, and started making my own notes on the backs of the pages. Lo and behold, my list started approaching 50 too! And it occurred to me that if I posted my 50 here on my blog, Beth would have her 100! (And, just maybe, one of you would find an idea that rescues you from a long, fussy afternoon one of these days.)
So, I'm going to spend the next week posting 10 ideas at a time until I get through all 50.
*Note- For the record, if you read through Beth's blog, she certainly could have compiled another 50 by now with all her creative ideas! (She's the originator of the Sculpey nature prints that have made the rounds on many blogs.) I highly recommend an afternoon spent with her archives!
OK- here it goes: the first ten ideas for toddler days (actually the 51st through the 60th if you start with Beth's list):

1. Set up a "potion station"- This lets kids act as chefs, scientists, or simply mess-makers. They LOVE this one. I like to give them flour, soda, colored waters, pipettes, glitter (in a shaker), turkey basters, funnels, and possibly some vinegar if you're going to be supervising (because of the cool reaction when mixed with baking soda.) Also include containers for mixing and pouring such as empty baby food jars and containers for pouring. I actually bought a few plastic graduated cylinders from this source so they could be like real scientists. If you want to give it more of a "cooking" feel, give them little bowls with lots of different "ingredients"- favorites around here include dried beans, oatmeal, cornmeal, goldfish crackers, colored sugar sprinkles, and old dried spices (nothing hot that could burn eyes.) Here's how I like to set this up: Put down a big vinyl tablecloth. Put a LARGE, fairly shallow bin on a low table-top (or on the floor, but the kids get messier when it's on the floor.) I like to use a futon-style bench my DH made that stays in our backyard, but a piece of plywood stretched across some cinder blocks would work just fine. Then put all the "ingredients" inside the large container. I tell the kids they can do whatever they want- mix, mash, drip, etc. as long as it stays inside the bin. Of course, it doesn't stay in the bin, so be mentally prepared for that. Recently I did this inside on my kitchen floor. Know what? They made a huge mess that we were able to clean up in about 15 minutes with a broom, wet sponges, and a dishwasher. I say, let them make messes! It's what toddlerhood is all about. Seeing how engaged they are in this activity and how proud they are of their "concoctions" makes it worth the mess.
2. "Cook" some Mudballs - This is a yummy snack and is a fun one to make with your toddler. They are really good at smashing up the graham cracker in a zip-lock bag. See recipe here.
3. Snowball fight- What to do with all those old magazines and catalogs? We have a snowball fight. Rip out lots of pages and ball them up into paper balls. (Toddlers like to help with this.) Then, put down a line of masking tape in the middle of a room. The idea is to throw the snowballs at each other in a set amount of time (a timer with a ringer or buzzer adds to the fun.) The winner is the person with the fewest number of snowballs on his/her side at the end. For younger and only children, Mom and Dad will need to model this a few times to give them the idea. For siblings, kids vs. parent works well. And older kids can just go to town at this on their own. At the end, we try to race and see if we can get all the snowballs into a bag before the timer rings.
4. Play dress up from mommy’s closet- Sometimes the dress-up chest gets a little stale and over-played-with. One day I was inspired to invite the kids into my closet and try on some of Mommy and Daddy's things. It was a big hit.
5. Greeting card fun - Do you save greeting cards? I highly recommend it. More than once I've lectured myself on being a hoarder and said, "Just throw them away!" but somehow knowing that they cost $2-$4 each makes it hard for me. Now that I have young kids I'm glad I saved them. Here are some of the fun things we do with our greeting cards:

Keep them as a "collection" in a pretty box. Brother and Sister can have some serious fun bringing them to an adult one at a time and back again to the box. I know, it doesn't sound fun at all, but they like it. (Especially when the adult makes a big deal over each card, "Oh, look! And Easter bunny with a colorful egg! I like this one!")
Sorting games- I'll offer a prompt like, "Find all the cards with a bunny." or "Find all the cards with something red." Sometimes they come up with their own idea, like grouping them by holiday or by sparkly vs. not sparkly, etc.
Collage- Sometimes we decide to cut a few up and add the images to our collages.
Play mailman- Brother and Sister have great fun bagging up the cards into fabric totes and delivering mail to various stuffed animal friends. We round up our toy mailboxes and create others out of shoe boxes, bins, etc.

6. Present hunt in the house (like an Easter Egg hunt but use small boxes) - This one takes some prep. work but it can really rescue a day turning sour. Collect some small boxes- jewelry boxes work great. Put a small treat inside each one (a small candy, small toy, a sticker, etc.) Wrap them in wrapping paper and set them aside until you REALLY need them. Then, when you decide it's the right time, have the kids sit in one spot (like on a bed) while you hide the presents. (It helps to have them see them before they're hidden so they know what they're seeking.) Have them go on a search and bring all the wrapped presents to one location. (I have them put them in a laundry basket.) Then, divvy them up and open! *I recently decided to paint the boxes so that I don't have to wrap them. It's easier to get organized for it and has the same effect. **Also, the prizes are nothing fabulous. A sticker here, a few M&Ms there- it's all good to them!
7. Mrs. Magoo's magical purse - Does your toddler love to "hoard" small things? Sister, especially, has always been a hoarder. We go to playgroup and she ends up walking around the room clutching 10 small toys in her little arms. Toddlers also love to "discover" and unpack/repack. I got out an old purse and did a little embellishing with paint and glitter to make it look more magical. Then I loaded it with some small "treasures"- small dolls and animals, various odds and ends. (See the photo.) It really doesn't take much to make the purse seem "magical"- novelty is the key. So, on a rainy day, "find" Mrs. Magoo's magical purse and let them explore. Then, during an opportune time (like while they're sleeping), make it "disappear." I always tell them Mrs. Magoo must be going on another trip and needs her bag so she can pack. It makes it really fun to add a new little item or two every now and then and let them "discover" something new. Here are a few of the current contents of the purse:

8. Wash-Away-Your-Blues - Beth mentioned this idea on her list, but it is such a great one that it bears another mention. If you're up for a little splashing and puddle wipe-up, you can provide your toddler with a fun activity with no expense. On a nice day, I set up a water station on the back porch or in the yard. On bad weather days, I strip them down and let them play in the tub. While doing simple things like pouring water and playing with water toys is fun, I find that their play is much more engaged and long-lasting (and often less messy!) if I provide a focus. Some ideas: offer some plastic baby dolls, small washrags and sponges, and a little soapy water for baby washing, let them round up their plastic toys or plastic dishes for washing, wash shells and rocks, or give them a bin of items with which to experiment the scientific properties of sink/float. You could also make it an art exploration by providing some homemade bathtub paints. It is also very helpful to provide them with various pouring items- plastic drinking cups, measuring cups with handles, etc. Brother is especially fond of ping-pong balls because he can't make them stay submerged. (Lots of giggles!) Another idea is to use a Sharpie to draw faces onto ping pong balls and use 1/2 of a (cleaned) Styrofoam egg carton as a "boat." Foam meat trays (clean!) also make cool "barges" for small plastic animals. 9. Celebrate some less-common holidays- Last year after Christmas and New Year's Day had passed, it seemed like a long, dull time until Valentine's Day and then Spring. Beck offered some great suggestions for January and February on her blog. Go here to see! I have also some fun "holidays" on our family calendar. A few include:
March 3- Hina-matsuri (Japanese doll festival) See info. about it here.
March 13- Good Samaritan Day (On this day we perform Random Acts of Kindness. Next year we're going to do some guerrilla art on this day too.)
March 18- Johnny Appleseed Day
March 20- First Day of Spring
May 1- May Day and Mother Goose Day
May 5- Children’s Day
May 19 Circus Day
June 25- Eric Carle’s B-day (I'll share more about him later this week.)
July 28- Beatrix Potter’s Birthday
August 12- Middle Child’s Day *We don't celebrate this one because there is no "middle child" in our house, but I think it's a great idea.
September 9- Teddy Bear Day

And one I have dreamed up for fun, Rainbow Day: This one is scheduled for late June at our house, and here's my plan. We are going to use this day to honor God’s faithfulness and celebrate the beauty of his creation. I'll start by reading the story of Noah’s Ark (and/or use puppets and/or set up a scene and/or act it out) Then we'll:
Decorate the house with rainbow colors (to remember God’s sign of promise)
Wear white t-shirts and squirt each other with colored waters, and paint our shirts
Eat the rainbow; set out foods in color rows or areas to make a rainbow, eat Jello jigglers in multiple colors, drink brightly colored Kool-Aids,
Play outside with tinted waters, clear tubing, funnels, and ice cubes
Go on a color hunt in the yard (and note the beauty of God’s creation)
Talk about the colors of the people in the world/ diversity
Do some tie-dye
Play a color-based game
I will certainly post about our first Rainbow Day after it happens!

::The fun thing about these days is that they are totally optional. I keep them on the calendar and decide whether to celebrate them (and to what extent) based on the other things happening in our lives at the time. For example, this year I had really wanted to celebrate the Japanese Doll Festival in our own way (because Sister would LOVE it) but that week was already so overloaded that I didn't need to add to it. However, Good Samaritan Day worked nicely for us this year. We read the Bible story and ended up delivering some cookies to families and friends and taking some homemade cards to the nursing home down the road. Of course, once you celebrate these days one or two years in a row, they will become OFFICIAL holidays to your kids and you'll have to keep it up!
10. Create a scrapbook page with your child- Many of us become scrapbookers of some kind or another when we have children. When Sister was born, I discovered this craft/hobby and really got into it... until Brother was born. Since then I've only had time to do one measly page. Poor Brother. It's just so hard to find the time! So, to solve the problem and bring my children in on the fun, I've started scrapbooking with them. I do have some tips for you if you decide to give this a try:

Limit the quantity of art supplies- they'll want to use it all! I usually put out a few papers, safety scissors, a few photos, glue sticks, some good quality markers and crayons, and one or two fun extras (such as a few stickers, rubber stamps, glitter, Prima flowers, etc.)
Once you've introduced the concept, let them do it. Don't interfere by suggesting where they should place their photos, offering design tips, etc. On the flip side, you work on your own page too and don't let them interfere with your work either. That way you both end up with a product you like.
Offer to transcribe their dictation onto the page to record what they want to say about the photos, the layout, etc. (If they refuse, I usually just have them talk to me about their memories of the event we're scrapbooking and write it down, along with any sweet or funny comments, on a separate piece of paper. Then I attach it to the back later.

Here we are at work during our last family scrapbooking session:

And here are two of the "finished product" pages. As you can see, process is our focus around here! (But I actually do love their products!) Sister's is on the left, Brother's on the right. (And I did blur their faces in Photoshop, so don't be scared by that!) See you tomorrow for the next ten ideas!

PS- I must mention that this post "series" has been languishing in an incomplete format for quite some time until I saw Bethany's post of summertime activities. She got me motivated to finally finish them up! Thanks, Bethany! :-)

Check back next week...

2008-06-05T14:52:00.000-07:00

I'm working this week (teaching a grad. class) so life is rather hectic. On top of that, we have 3 parties/events this week in the evening, so I'm not going to be posting again here until next Monday. But do check back, because I have several posts in the works that will give you some ideas to occupy your toddler/preschooler.
Hope you're having a great week!

2008-06-02T19:16:00.000-07:00

OK. I'm still alive, and feeling better. Thanks for the well-wishes!

While I've been "bed-resting" a bit, I have had fun planning some summer activities. One on the top of the list right now (just because I'm into it at the moment) is the idea to have a luau when our family rents a beach house together this summer. I think it would be an fun way to end our week together.

And check out what I bought on Etsy?

Hula dancer cake toppers so we can make this fabulous cake.

******

****

Trees (also for the cake.)

***

Some cocktail umbrellas (Sister will be able to make the drinks fancy.)

***

And these fabulous hula dancer beads. I think I'm also going to buy some colorful wooden beads and have bracelet-making be an activity at the party.

The first three items are from this Etsy shop and the hula girl beads are from this one.

With a good haul from Oriental Trader (you should see Sister's wish list!!), we'll be set. It's not until July, but planning a luau has been a rather cheering activity.

Hope you all are HEALTHY! (fresh respect for being healthy) and enjoying your week.

emergency room part I

2008-05-30T17:28:00.001-07:00

Well. There is nothing like a middle-of-the-night ambulance ride to put things in perspective. The person in the ambulance was me: I woke up at 3:30 in the morning with an excruciating pain on my right side that only worsened over the next hour. To make a long story short, after several tests and a night spent at the hospital, they still don't know what it is. I'm feeling a tad better, though I still have a fair amount of abdominal pain and discomfort. The doctors and I decided to "see how I do" over the weekend. I must say, as much as I love doctors, it was rather frustrating to go through all that (CT scan after drinking a HUGE amount of DISGUSTING Barium, 2 ultrasounds, gyno exam, various needle pricks and IVs, etc.) and leave the hospital without an answer. I guess that's how it goes. I guess that's better than hearing some really bad news of some kind.

So, I'm home. Taking it easy. Hoping I don't wake up at 3:30 again tonight with that same pain. And feeling a brand new level of empathy for sick people.
I'll leave you with something that made me laugh so hard a few weeks ago that I kept remembering it in the ER and cracking up (and then cringing horribly as the pain shot across my stomach.)

Here's a favorite comic: Brian Regan. (Do watch Emergency Room Part 2 as well.)

2008-05-27T10:32:00.000-07:00

This past weekend DH and I attended a wedding and, for the first time, took Sister along with us. The mother of the bride (my former boss and current friend) told us to bring her and I thought she'd enjoy the magical beauty of a wedding. She did, but I was sweating it for a few minutes in the church when Sister started getting a little squirrely. Apparently the Preacher's mini-sermon on the life changes brought on by marriage wasn't all that magical to Sister. Thank goodness for the tiny pencils and offering envelopes sitting there in the pew (God bless the Presbyterians- you can always count on them for tiny pencils and envelopes.) I did a little drawing to entertain her and it worked.
I surprised myself by tearing up when the bride walked down the aisle. I don't usually do that, but what got me was seeing my friend, the bride's mother, watch her daughter walk down the aisle. I suddenly had this flash-forward in my mind to 20ish years from now when I will likely watch Sister doing the exact same thing. My friend looked so happy and proud, not sad at all, but I could only imagine that it seemed like yesterday that her own daughter was a wriggling preschooler in her lap. Everyone tells me, "Don't blink! She'll be grown before you know it!" but it's one of those things you just can't appreciate in the moment when you're potty training and sleep deprived and cleaning up a room full of toys for the 100th time.
The wedding itself was so beautiful. My boss/friend is one of the classiest women I know, and of course the wedding followed suit. The reception was at an old plantation in a meeting hall/ barn kind of building but they had made it really beautiful with greenery and white lights. They had even hung tiny chandeliers dripping fresh flowers over each of the 40+ tables. I can only imagine how much the event cost- especially once I got a glimpse of the food. Major spread! They had everything you could imagine- roast beef, shrimp, crab legs, a variety of breads and dips, ham biscuits, spring rolls, etc. etc. etc. PLUS a big sushi bar. Quite fabulous. (Of course, the only thing Sister would eat out of the entire line-up was a deviled egg and a cheddar muffin.)
One thing I wanted to remember for future wedding plans (Sister's, not mine) was that they did make one mistake that could be avoided. The wedding was at 6:00, so people arrived at the reception around 7:00- STARVING. All the food was set out but was covered with saran wrap; the message obviously being that it wasn't time to eat. There were waiters going around with tiny little servings of appetizers, but that wasn't cutting it. There was one table in the corner with some fresh veggies, olives, deviled eggs, and crackers that wasn't covered. The line for that table was 50 people deep at all times. By the time the wedding party arrived (around 7:40) and the caterer uncovered the rest of the spread, the first little table was decimated. And then the line for the main food (which could only be served off one side of the table- another error, in my opinion) was at least 100 people deep. So, having seen that, I would definitely tell the caterer to serve everything as soon as guests started arriving. I know it's tempting to wait for the wedding party to arrive (in fact, I remember this debate from my own wedding) but the reality is that it creates a huge log-jam and causes your guests to go hungry. There. I'll label this post "weddings" and then in 20 years I can pull it out and remember! HA!

food wars: return of the mommy

2008-05-25T11:19:00.000-07:00

OK. So time and space have a way of making things seem better. You could probably tell that I was rather irritated when I wrote my last post. (Sort of the "Dear Diary" syndrome creeping back into my writing.)
After a date night (Hark! We actually hired a sitter! Sound the bells! Cue the Heavenly chorus!) and a dose of John Rosemond, I have a new plan for dealing with Sister's picky eating.
1. I will not get mad. I will not get mad. I will not get mad. (If I say it enough times, maybe I will actually believe myself.)
2. I will serve three meals and two snacks per day. They will all be healthy foods. I will (somewhat) cater to her likes/dislikes at breakfast and lunch. Supper is what it is. I will plan these meals and snacks carefully so I don't resort to "Oh, gee. I don't know what to serve. How about some Ritz Crackers with a side of fruit roll-ups?"
3. I will put a very small portion of everything I have prepared on her plate. She can eat what she wants to eat. She will not get seconds of anything until her plate is clean. If she chooses not to eat, I will NOT GET MAD and will cover her plate and put it in the fridge. If she gets hungry before the next meal, I will simply pull the plate out of the fridge and put it on the table.
4. No dessert, sweets, or treats unless she eats all of her lunch/ dinner.
5. There will be no bribery, cajoling, etc. DH and I will not demonstrate in elaborate form how much we LOVE our vegetables. We will eat like normal people and will have normal conversation.
6. There will be zero tolerance for rudeness at the table (pushing food away, sulking, making gagging noises, etc.) If you do that you leave the table and go to the place where naughty children go.

DH and I are going to sit Sister down later and explain these new "house rules" in clear terms. Then it's in effect. I'll keep you posted.

I will not get mad. (One more time for good measure.)

2008-05-23T10:11:00.000-07:00

Where have I been? Battling head colds, that's where. Theirs, mine, plus a last minute ear infection for Brother. Nice.
Between all the sleepless nights, fussy whining, and genearal "too much time together in this house!" I got to feeling pretty sorry for myself. Then I remember that they're just MINOR illnesses in the comparative sense, and get renewed admiration for people like Mary Beth who persevere through something like their baby having cancer with such grace and positive energy. Amazing. I'm ashamed of myself.
Anyway, I guess the above has left me with not quite the usual amount of patience, because I just snapped at lunch and put Sister in time-out for refusing to taste her pizza. (The kind of pizza SHE likes, purchased just for her.)
I know you're not supposed to do that. I know it is highly unwise to make the dinner table a battle field. I know you're just supposed to act like you don't give a care in the world when your child refuses to eat. But you know what? To quote Popeye, "I've had all I can stands; I can't stands no more."
I guess I'm just old school. I was taught that you eat what's on your plate and you thank the cook for it, like it or not. I think it's the height of rudeness to push your plate away, cross your arms, and pout when served your meal. And I'm just not having it from one of mine.
I know she's only 3 and 1/2. But all I asked her to do was TASTE it, not clean her plate. And it was PIZZA for crying out loud!
After I got her out of time-out, I gave her the choice to come to the table and eat or go to bed for her nap early. She chose the nap. Stubborn!!!
It seems that my beloved eldest daughter is about to find out just how stubborn her Mama is, too. Guess what's going to be served for Sister at her next meal?

too sexy

2008-05-19T16:57:00.000-07:00

I was at the park the other day with the kids, sweating in the 90 degree heat of the afternoon
(can they not leave even ONE tree when they create these new neighborhoods????), when another family joined us. They were a Muslim family. I know this because of the woman's attire: black head covering, long sleeve shirt with a vest over the top, and jeans. Her husband was wearing a t-shirt and soccer shorts. The kids were also wearing summer clothing. At first, the "I am woman, hear me roar!" side of me got pretty annoyed at seeing a fellow mother dressed in those suffocating clothes, chasing her two young toddlers around the park while her husband went over to a soccer field and kicked a ball around. (The Dad not helping out with the kids part would have annoyed me no matter what the race/religion.)
But then I remembered that they don't share my cultural and religious beliefs, and that I shouldn't judge them. I actually think people of Muslim faith are probably onto something regarding modesty. I wouldn't go as far as they do to cover up, but I understand the intent. As I see women in public places like the grocery store, I am often ASTONISHED at the things they will wear. (Or, more to the point, fail to wear.) Do we really need to see all that cleavage, or upper thigh cellulite, super-tightness that reveals all, or just general skin? And more often than not, these women are already married with kids, so it's not like they're trying to snag a man. I say, "Save it for the bedroom, sister!"
Anyway, off the soapbox and back to the playground.
I made an effort to talk with the Muslim mom. She seemed shy and nervous around me, but was nice and smiled a lot. Her English wasn't great, but we talked a bit and compared our kids' ages and such. Her little boy looked to be about Brother's age and they shared a soccer ball for a little while quite sweetly. And I remembered an old movie where a woman says something to the effect that if all the mothers of the world could just get together and talk, there would be no war. In the movie, the guests at the dinner party meet this statement with derision, but I think it's true. Standing there in my shorts and t-shirt, I am sure I looked as ridiculously dressed to her as she did to me. But we found some common ground there at the park, smiling at each other over the tops of our children's heads.
I did have to secretly laugh at the patch on her jeans, though. In large letters it said, "TOO SEXY." It seems to me that such a message stamped on the rear of your jeans kinds of defeats the purpose of all the oppresive layers of clothing. But just maybe my fellow mom isn't quite as oppressed as she seemed.

Life can be sweet

2008-05-16T10:23:00.000-07:00

Like everyone else, we're enjoying strawberry season in the South.

FYI- Sister's shirt says "My Dad Rocks" in huge blue-glittered gothic letters. I got it at a yard sale for $4. Awesome.

Happy weekend, friends!

Brother and me (specifically, our legs)

2008-05-14T12:49:00.000-07:00

This is Brother's favorite new spot: firmly attached to one (or both) of my legs. Kind of makes walking a challenge, but at least I know where he is at all times (which is more than I can say for my friend who is struggling these days with her teenaged son.)

2008-05-13T11:08:00.000-07:00

The forest folk have been living in some custom-style tree houses this week. They seem to like it very much.

Fairies are from Magic Cabin.

Small stuffed animals from this etsy shop.

Wooden animals from Anne Moze (so wonderful and cheaper than the European brands!)

Blocks built by my husband last Christmas.

Sesame Street - Two Little Dolls(better copy)

2008-05-12T10:36:00.001-07:00

Last week I checked out the Sesame Street Old School DVD for Sister and Brother. (And let's be honest- for me too. I wanted to see Sesame Street the way I remembered it.) This was the first clip we watched, and it transported me instantly back to my childhood. Any of you remember it?

Mama got a new pair of shoes...

2008-05-08T10:39:00.000-07:00

... but was so distracted while loading the car that she forgot to take them off Sister's feet and put them on her own, thus accidentally wearing old-lady clodhoppers to her graduate-class teaching gig instead of the stylish wedge sandals. Sheesh.

um, I didn't think it was THAT big...

2008-05-06T10:01:00.000-07:00

For Brother's birthday party (coming soon!) I decided to buy one of those jump houses designed to be used at home. They are always pictured in yards, but I say why not the living room? Only thing is- it's a tad bigger than I thought. Just a smidgen. I mean, it only takes up the ENTIRE den (which is a rather large room.) So, there's enough space, right?

(Picture DH rolling his eyes and shaking his head at me.)

Oh, well. I may not will an award for mathematical/spatial thinking but my kids think I'm a pretty cool mom right now. ;-)

"date night"

2008-05-05T10:28:00.000-07:00

I put date night in quotes because most of our date nights tend to be at-home-after-the-kids-are-in-bed affairs. (Getting a babysitter and doing things out and about town on a weekly basis tends to be cost-prohibitive.) On this date night, we spent time with our plans for our new house, tweaking problem areas and envisioning each space. I love this stage of building a house. You can sit down with all your dreams and a stack of home magazines and books and create!

the smallest shell seeker

2008-05-03T15:23:00.000-07:00

sunset

2008-05-02T12:12:00.000-07:00

wordless

2008-05-01T10:41:00.001-07:00

I am feeling strangely wordless lately. I sit down to jot a note for this blog and just can't think of what to say. It's quite unprecedented for me, actually.
So, I'm going to rip off Amanda's idea and do a series of photos from our daily life. I can't promise to post one every day, but I'll try my best. (It only takes FOREVER to upload my digital photos to the computer.)
In the meantime, I'll quite greedily gobble up all your words on your blogs.
See you tomorrow with a photo.

Why the Bachelor will never work

2008-04-29T16:17:00.000-07:00

So last night I got SUCKED into watching The Bachelor on TV. The DH likes to fall asleep to tv and he's had it on a few times so as a result I'm familiar with the show (even though I try to tune it out. I try so hard! But when women are biting chunks out of soda cans with their teeth to get the Bachelor's attention it's darn HARD to turn away!!!) So when DH said, "Oh, come on! You know you want to see who he picks!" I was like, "Drat you!!! I HATE this show!!" And then I stayed up until 11pm watching it while he snored next to me.
But I just have to say, first of all, I think it is one of the stupidest reality tv shows they've come up with- and that's a big insult due to the sheer volume of HORRID reality tv programming. The concept of having one hunky bachelor and 20+beautiful women competing for him with the idea that he'll meet "Mrs. Right" and they'll get married and have babies is pure rubbish. It never works. It never will.
That is not how men operate.
Men are hunters. They like the chase. This is not a secret- it's one of those universal truths that has existed since the beginning of time. As a rule, men do not like for women to pursue them. Flirting? Yes. Come hither glances? Yes. Returned phone calls? Sure. But doing outlandish things to get attention (singing opera, pole dancing, biting into cans (I can't get over that one!)- and beggaring oneself with every phrase under the sun that means "pick me!!!"- not what men want. I'm rather confident of this, having been around a few times on the dating carousel myself.
So why do the guys do it? Because just as much as I've never known a guy who wanted to marry a forward woman who was trying to run him to ground, I've also never met one who wouldn't want to be surrounded by dozens of beautiful women who all WANT HIM. I mean, really- what red-blooded man doesn't want that? It's a dream come true.
Of course, after he's lived in a fantasy world of intricately planned over-the-top dates and weekends in Barbados, he may think he's made a match. And then they have this final (and ridiculous) rose ceremony where the Bachelor gets on one knee (in front of cameras, of course) and gives a pretty speech and tells his bachelorette how he's fallen head over heels, and won't she marry him? Cue the doves and flower petals.
And then, a few months later, we read in People magazine that they aren't together anymore- it "didn't work out."
REALLY? How SHOCKING!
I guess once the romantic villas and lavish dates and tv cameras go away, these two people finally realize that they really don't know each other at all. He doesn't know she can't cook. She doesn't know what a whiny sick patient he'll be. He doesn't know how to reconcile their different goals for the future. She doesn't know how to reconcile their religious beliefs. He doesn't know that she has a lot of childhood baggage that plays into some major family drama. She doesn't know that his childhood dream is to move to the woods and build a cabin. He doesn't know that she likes to get up and run first thing in the morning. She doesn't know that he likes to sleep in until noon and exercise in the evening. He doesn't know that Jim Carrey impressions can always make her laugh. She doesn't know that letting him have 10 minutes with the paper when he gets home from work makes all the difference.
They don't know anything. Their relationship is a castle of sand to be crushed by the first big wave because it's imaginary. There is nothing real about it, aside from a sexual attraction and maybe some basic friendship/camaraderie.
And still I watch.
So what I'm wondering is who is stupider- them or me?

Inez got it right.

2008-04-24T10:25:00.000-07:00

My grandmother, Mary, is one of 7 children. She was born and raised on a farm in the Carolina mountains. Her mother, Inez, like most women of her generation, was responsible for the household - washing, sewing, mending, cooking, cleaning, etc.- with NO modern conveniences. They had an outhouse. Inez put three hot (and reportedly delicious) meals on the table each day. (They never ate at a restaurant as there weren't any in the tiny town where they lived.) She even performed chores that don't appear on my radar, like wringing the necks of chickens, plucking their feathers, and lots of other GROSS things like that. On top of being a good home-maker, my great-grandmother is remembered as a fun-loving, sweet and kind person who loved to laugh.
Lately, I have been thinking about her more and more.
I have 2 kids (as opposed to 7 !), a dishwasher, plumbing, washing machine and dryer, Target, Wal-Mart, a variety of take-out restaurants nearby, a car, paper plates, a husband who helps out around the house (usually), and no need to ever lay one stitch in a piece of fabric unless I want to do so. And yet, at the end of many days, I feel completely whipped by this life. Spent. Overwhelmed.
And then, thinking about Inez, I feel SILLY.
Very silly.
I am sure that my lifestyle would look like the lap of luxury to her. But I can't bury this sneaking suspicion that somehow, her life had a different quality. Something less complex- the original "simple life." I think back then people had more clearly defined roles. While they may have been limiting, they were also freeing in a sense. I don't imagine that Inez ever worried about how she would supplement the family's income- that wasn't her job. Inez didn't have to keep up her professional credentials so that she could re-enter the workforce at any given time- that wasn't part of her duty. Inez didn't have to battle time-draining technology like email and cell phones and yes, the Internet. Inez certainly didn't (according to first-hand reports) spend a moment worrying about entertaining her kids!
She loved her kids. She was a wonderful mother. She made sure all their needs were met. But entertainment? Not so much.
I've been reading John Rosemond. (Can you tell?) I used to think he was a right-wing fundamentalist meanie. Now I think he's just RIGHT.
He talks about how upside-down many of our child-rearing practices are today. Let me quote a few lines from my new favorite book, New Parent Power:
"In the years since World War II, we have become increasingly and neurotically obsessed with the raising of children. Something that used to be a fairly commonsense responsibility has taken on the trappings of science. Along the way, child-rearing has become "parenting," with all its high-pressured implications. ... Within the child-centered family, the implicit understanding is that children are the most important members, and the parent-child relationship is the most important relationship. The more child-centered the American family has become, the more demandingly self-centered American children have become. And the more demanding the children, the more demanding the task of raising them." (And he says so much more. I highly recommend his book.)
And reading his text, I realize that I've fallen into the trap, too. Again and again, I fall in. I spend hours planning activities to do with my children. I carefully analyze our toys- which ones are best? What toy should I buy next? I spend most of my time interacting with them, playing with them, supervising them. (Somewhat necessary since Brother is still a little fellow.) The house falls down around me but I can't clean it because the children demand my attention. Supper is take-out again because the children demand my attention. There is not one ounce of energy left in me at the end of the day to feed my marriage because the children drink every last drop.
And, honestly, isn't it all too much already? Do they really NEED this? Is it even good for them? Or am I doing them a disservice by creating two people who are dependent on someone else for their entertainment/ happiness?

Surely Inez didn't wrack herself with guilt that she couldn't spend the morning playing in the floor with her children. I don't think it even occurred to her. Between cleaning up from a hot breakfast for 9, maintaining her home, and preparing lunch and supper for 9 plus the field hands, I doubt there was much time for her to entertain her kids with puppet shows and design "learning centers" for them. I mean, SERIOUSLY.
So how did these poor un-played-with children fare in the cold, cruel world? Did they overcome this terrible lack of playrooms and toys and preschool programs and mothers-who-do-amazing-craft-projects-with-them? Let's see what they became:
Son #1- Economic Whiz and self-made millionaire
Son #2- College Professor
Daughter #1- Teacher and Home-maker (wife to town Mayor)
Daughter #2- Teacher and Home-maker (wife to state Senator)
Son #3- College Professor, agricultural entrepreneur, real-estate investor, self-made millionaire
Daughter #4- Teacher and Home-maker (wife to heart surgeon)
Son #4- Professional farmer who took over the home-place
And that's only their "measurable, "worldly successes. They also had happy marriages and wonderful families- lots of children. They were all very active in their churches. NONE of them ever divorced.
In looking at what their childhood lacked, I'm trying to figure out what it HAD. Because THAT'S what I want to give my kids.
Yes, I live in a different era. There is no changing it. And I am surely thankful that I don't have to wring a chicken's neck for my dinner tonight. Or sew our clothes. Or hand-wash our laundry.
And I certainly don't think there is anything wrong with craft projects, or toys, or preschool.
But I'm rethinking some things.
You?

2008-04-22T10:44:00.000-07:00

Have you seen this going around? It's kind of fun.

So me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
So not me...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
So me...

++++
So not me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
So me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
So not me...

++++++++++++++++++++
So me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++
So not me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++
So me...

+++++++++++++++++++++++
So not me...

Gee, this is fun. I could do this all day, except that I have some chores to do. Anyone else want to play? If you do, tell me in the comments so I can check your blog!

lamest post ever

2008-04-21T10:28:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling guilty about being so many days between posts when I realized that:
1) Everyone is doing it! Spring is in the air.
2) I'm not supposed to care, because I blog without obligation.

So there.
And I know I promised to post my "weird" post but I lost steam on that. Thing is, I need to be in a weird mood to finish it, and that just hasn't happened in the last few days.
Grumpy? Yes. Stressed? Yes. Happy? Yes. Relaxed? Yes. Sleepy? Yes. Hyped-up? Yes.
Weird? Ummmm, no. But I'm due for some weird any minute. So that post should be forthcoming.
I've also been busy. Saturday I taught a class for teachers and administrators on how to integrate the arts into their teaching of the "basics." It's one of my "passionate topics" and I love the mental stimulation of preparing for the classes. I'll be teaching for the next four Saturdays. Having me work weekends definitely adds to the stress around here, but it's also a good thing. It's nice to actually MISS my kids, you know? (Not to mention making some extra cash.)

Yes, this is my lamest post ever. Sorry!

Who, me?

2008-04-16T18:31:00.000-07:00

I'm working on a weird blog post (that will reveal my weird, weird imagination) but I just had to post here to say that the lovely Jennifer has given me a blog award! I know most of you have gobs of them, but this is my first one and I'm oh, so excited. Here 'tis:

It's the blog of distinction award given to "a blogger who makes you laugh, cry, think, or sigh."

I feel so honored! For me to do any of those things for Jennifer is a thrill, because she is an excellent blogger with diverse (and very interesting) topics, and I always make sure to read her blog when I can THINK because it's worth it. You know? So, thanks Jennifer!!!

And now I must pass it on. So here it goes:

To Beck, of course, because she makes me laugh, cry, think and sigh all the time (usually all in one blog post.) She's probably been given this kind of award 10 dozen times, but still I must give it to her!

And to Kate-who I found through mini-swap and who I love to read because of her ability to make her daily life sound so lovely. (Lots of sighs! Just check out that banner photo!)

OK- I hope to have my weird, sci-fi post up tomorrow. Maybe the next.

Scarlett gets what she wants

2008-04-15T05:29:00.000-07:00

Last weekend my DH flew to a far-away location to visit with his 82-year-old grandmother on her birthday, and join the related family festivities. I fled to my mother's house (locally) because I am a BIG CHICKEN and am afraid to stay in my house alone.
I thought I would get lots of blogging done, but I didn't anticipate one obstacle: Brother. I set up his Pak-N-Play in my mom's guest room/office and every time I could have gotten on the computer, he was sleeping in there! So, I had an unplanned vacation from the Internet. It wasn't a bad thing, but I missed you guys!
Anyway, this weekend was also our local school's consignment/rummage sale. I love this sale. It's HUGE and is geared towards all things kid-related (baby stuff, gear, equipment, toys, clothes, books, etc.) I always score some awesome deals and have so much fun shopping. This year I consigned some things and also signed up to work the sale on Saturday. If you consign or volunteer, you get to come shop the pre-sale Friday night (and cherry-pick all the good stuff!)
So here comes the story:
Friday morning I was helping with the set-up and I spied the golden prize: a like-new Schwinn double jogging stroller with a bike hitch! Now, this is not something I wanted. This is something my sweet sister-in-law has been wanting (and talking about non-stop) for months. She and my brother are teachers and live on peanuts, so buying a $300 stroller is out of the question. She's been scouring yard sales and the Internet forever, but hasn't found the stroller in her price range.
But Friday morning, there it was- shiny and in great shape and only fifty bucks!!!
I was so excited. And when I told my SIL, she was ecstatic. We were both on pins and needles all day, waiting for the pre-sale to start.
Now, here's the deal. The pre-sale started at 7:oo on Friday night. In the past we've had problems with people starting the shopping before 7:00 and pushing things to the side and marking them "sold" throughout the day. Not fair. Not cool. So this year the girl running the sale made a point to say that nothing was to be moved or sold until 7:00.
So, SIL and I arrived at the building at 6:30- we were first in line!- and stood there waiting and looking at the beautiful stroller gleaming at us from across the cafeteria. We had 30 minutes to kill, and so we chatted with the other women who were there finishing the set-up. Suddenly, at 6:50, SIL looks at me and says, "Susan! The stroller is gone!"
WHAT???
I looked. She was right. It had disappeared. I was stunned. And then I got angry. Someone was breaking the rules. I stepped into the room and saw what had happened. There is always a wall of tables set up for vendors (selling new things like monogrammed clothes, Discovery Toys, etc.) One of the vendors had left her table and snaked that stroller- pushing it over to the wall near her spot!
So I said something to one of my friends who was setting up. She went and said something to the woman in charge, who went and told the vendor she couldn't do that. So the vendor apologized and pushed the stroller back into the room- about 3 feet from her table! Meanwhile SIL and I are about 30 yards away at the door.
I knew exactly what would happen. As soon as they opened the sale at 7:00, she would just step out and grab that stroller. My SIL looked like she could cry. "Oh, well," she said, "I guess it's gone."
I was TICKED. "Um, no- not yet." I said through clenched teeth.
I stood there and tried to think what to do. I am not an aggressive person. I do not like confrontation. I am not good at approaching people in situations like that. And I have reached a point where material things are NOT worth relationships. But my SIL deserved that stroller. And we were following the rules. If one of the women who busted her fanny organizing and working that sale had wanted the stroller, that's one thing. But for some random vendor to take advantage of her ability to be in the building before the start of the sale and snake that stroller- well, I just couldn't let that go.
Next thing I know, I'm walking across the room to the vendor.
I smile sweetly, "Hi. I am so sorry, and I hate to do this, but I saw you push this stroller over here and I need to tell you that I've been here for 30 minutes at the front of the line so I could buy it."
The vendor (a very lovely woman) stared at me and said, "Oh."
Pause.
"Then you can have it."
I said, "No- I want to be fair. The sale is starting in 3 minutes. You want the stroller and I want the stroller. What if we flip a coin?"
She was very nice. She smiled and said, "OK. That sounds fair!"
I called heads. (I wasn't feeling nice enough to let her call it.)
HEADS!
She was very gracious in defeat and laughed, "I guess it was meant to be yours!"
We talked another minute and then I started walking back across the room to my SIL. Then I noticed another woman swooping in on the stroller! Geez!
So, I went back and planted my hand on that stroller and waited until the sale was officially open. The look on my SIL's face when she saw me pushing that stroller toward her was priceless. And I had so much adrenaline pumping from that little encounter that I shopped like I was on Speed for the rest of the night.
SIL has spent the last 5 years playing Melanie Wilkes to my Scarlett O'Hara. Tiresome, I'm sure.
But sometimes it's nice to have Scarlett on your side.

2008-04-10T16:19:00.000-07:00

Where have I been? Man, life is clipping past me at quite a rapid pace. Between DH's work, negotiating, re-negotiating, and re-re-negotiating a contract on our house, having it inspected, and spending what seems like hours on the phone with our realtor, there just aren't many spare moments. But in the ones I do have, I've been scheming.
I am determined to make my hours home with my children more enjoyable and more productive. Right now it's survival mode; keep Brother from seriously injuring himself. Keep Sister from watching too much tv, keep the siblings playing nicely, keep the clutter from swallowing me whole. By 6:00 every day I feel very, how shall I say... put out. And just in time for the DH's homecoming! So lovely.
I don't like this attitude. It's too much Eyeore, too little Tigger. (A la The Last Lecture .) So, I'm scheming. And if I had time, I'd share my scheme with you. As it is, a bottom needs wiping, a boy needs bathing (desperately!) so I'd better run along.
I shall return.

Cowboys- the ideal birthday gift

2008-04-08T05:46:00.001-07:00

The other day as we left school, Sister had a little crisis because she NEEDS some plastic fairies like the ones shared by her classmate that day during Show-And-Tell. She was rather distressed that I wouldn't drive straight to the store to pick some up. We had a little talk about waiting for special occasions to get special toys. When we got home I offered to help her create a list of things she'd like to receive for her birthday. Seeing me record her heart's desires seemed to make the wait a little more bearable. Would you like to see what Sister really wants for her birthday?

Sister's Birthday List:

1. Fairies

2. Dolls

3. Cowboys

4. Toothbrushes

5. Greeting Cards

I realize that the last 2 items are rather unconventional gift requests for a 3 and 1/2 year old, but number 3 was what really caught my eye: cowboys.

I have no idea where she came up with this one. Cowboys have not been a big topic in our house, we don't watch any cowboy shows on TV, etc. But I think Sister is on to something. Cowboys are exactly what's wanted around here.

Just think of the excitement and adventure that would result from adding some cowboys to our household mix. Sure, I'd have to install a few spittoons, and maybe swinging doors on the front of our house instead of the traditional front door. And I suppose there would be a much higher chance of manure being tracked in on my rug, and I'd have to add a LOT more meat to the crock pot.

But cowboys are worth it. *sigh*

And Sister, at the ripe old age of 3, has already figured it out.

Dear Blog

2008-04-05T18:14:00.001-07:00

I have realized that this blog has become something akin to the Strawberry Shortcake diary I had when I was 11. It even had a little lock with a little, tiny key. I hid it under my mattress because I was such a SLY 11-year-old. (I hope my mom enjoyed the reading. My brother told me years later that he certainly did. Brat.)
Like the diary, this blog has become a place to record my extremes. I seem to turn to it when I'm in a mood of some sort- frustrated, or exasperated, or depressed, or just full of myself.
Dear Blog, My husband is gone all the time!
Dear Blog, This has been the worst day!
Dear Blog, my toddler won't eat his vegetables!
Dear Blog, My mom won't buy me the Benetton sweater! She's so mean! (that one is actually from the Strawberry Shortcake diary... vintage 80's)
Waa waa waa...
And I guess that's OK, because this blog is for me anyway, and maybe I have regressed to my 11-year old mentality of needing a place to vent all my strong emotions. Hanging out with a 1-year-old and 3-year-old all day, every day, will do that to you. I've got more strong emotions than stubbly hair on my legs at this stage in my life. (And that's a LOT.) Aside: Brother actually rubbed my leg the other day and said "Furry" in his sweet little voice with a big smile on his face. And then, with an even bigger smile- "Momo!"
Yes, sweetheart- fur. Just like Elmo. At least one male member of the household likes it.
As I was pondering my little blogging revelation, I came across this blog entry. It hits the nail on the head. So go read it, why don't you.
Anyway, I would just like you to know, for the record, that I'm actually a normal person. And that if we were friends, you would find me one of the most laid-back and even-keel women you know. (I hide my feelings very well.)
Happy weekend, and enjoy your glimpse under my mattress.

one of those days

2008-04-03T11:48:00.000-07:00

Oh, man. It's been one of those days, brought on by one of those weeks.
DH has had a crazy schedule. He hasn't been home much before 8pm this week and I'm not used to that. I feel like a single mom who is also expected to have a man-pleasing meal on the table and be a good evening companion. (As opposed to collapsing on the sofa in my rattiest sweatpants once the kids go to bed.) Not DH's fault at all, though- I know he'd rather be home with us. But it just makes for some LONG days.
I woke this morning at 5:00 (after also being wakened at 2:00 by Sister who needed her covers put back on!) to hear Brother coughing and crying. He went back to sleep- I couldn't.
When he did wake for the day, he had a nasty runny nose and a general fussy disposition. Poor thing seems to have caught a cold. Naturally, the morning dawned rainy and chill, and the weather hasn't improved.
Last night I read the first part of Amanda's book and sternly told myself, you CAN be this kind of parent. You CAN!
But by 10:00 am I was desperate to get them out of the house (one sibling quarrel too many) and so where did I go on a cold, rainy day with sickly children? Target, of course! An hour later, after an in-store Fruit Loop gorge, we emerged with foam letters for Brother's bath time, new swimsuits, a pretend beauty parlor set for Sister, a frozen pizza for lunch, and a new Barney video. Yes, a Barney video. I'm that tired. (So much for being a SouleMama today!)
It didn't really help. Brother is just so fussy- he fussed at the Barney video and he scattered his letters all over the bedroom and he drove Sister nuts as he kept running over and snatching her little beauty parlor things while she was trying to give Madeline a makeover. I was quite glad to put him down for his nap, bless his little heart.
Now I've had a 20 minute cat-nap and feel ready to face the afternoon. (DH will be late once again- he has to attend a PTA luau at his school. Sheesh! It never ends...)
However, chin up! I have a plan for rainy-day-sick-kids-long-afternoon-survival:
The bean-bin with scoops, cups, bowls, etc. (This is such a mess that I only pull it out when I'm desperate.)
this matching game
watercolor paints
this book with body crayons (stored in a chest for just such a rainy day)
I hope these combined activities get us until at least 6:00. And we're totally eating leftovers tonight. Cooking is so out.
Maybe I can be a SouleMama tomorrow!

crafty link!

2008-04-02T12:22:00.001-07:00

You know how you'll see some genius craft idea to do with your kids on a blog (and think you'll remember it) only to find that 3 weeks later, when you're ready to give it a shot, you can't remember the details OR which blog it was on? Well, check it out- Crafty Crow is a new blog collaborative that links to some of the coolest kid-crafting ideas out there in blogland. I'm loving the concept, and the projects that she's already posted look great.
I found it via Mary Beth at Salt and Chocolate, and I must tell you that if you want to know what kind of attitude you should have when your baby is diagnosed with cancer, then go read Mary Beth's blog. She is amazing to me.

ha ha

2008-04-01T10:34:00.000-07:00

OK. Since I've been so HEAVY on this blog lately, I decided to lighten things up. Here is a great story my DH brought home from school recently.
He was observing a kindergarten teacher as she was teaching a science lesson. It was something about gravity and force, and he said she was doing a great job. The kids were totally "into it." I must mention that this wonderful teacher is also rather overweight. You'll see why I had to mention that fact in a moment.
The teacher held up a stick with a rope and ball attached to the end. She asked the kids to observe what happened to the ball when she swung the stick. She started spinning the stick, and of course, the little ball went flying into orbit. The kids were riveted, and so when the teacher asked, "Boys and girls- what do you observe?" a little girl piped right up, "Ms. S! When you do that, the fat under your arm goes back and forth real fast!"
My husband said he almost died laughing (as quietly as he could.) The teacher, being the pro that she is, laughed too, and told the little girl that she had made a very accurate observation.
Kids are so funny!
Hope you have a great April Fool's Day. We're having a birthday bash at my house tonight for my Dad- a true April Fool (in the best sense.) I wonder if being born on this day was what made him so fun to be with and so good-humored? I'm attempting to make a clown cake that Sister saw in a fancy cookbook and just HAD to have for Pop's birthday. If it's decent, I'll post a picture tomorrow.
I'm off to bake!

Buzz-kill

2008-03-31T11:18:00.000-07:00

I know I'm a big downer lately, and I hate people like that. I had a sorority sister in college whom we secretly called "buzz-kill" (isn't that lovely?- such sisterly devotion) because of her incredible ability to steal the joy from a party with her conversation topics. There we were, girls in skimpy clothes, boys with too much testosterone, everyone drinking beer, dancing to loud music, and then she'd sidle up to you (and the boy you hoped would kiss you before the evening was out) and bring up partial-birth abortion. Or politics. Or how her sister's boyfriend had committed suicide.
Buzz-kill.
But I just can't help myself. I have to recount this sad story from church. (Why am I always full of sad stories from church? My church is actually a very joyful place.)
I was sitting on the end of an aisle, waiting for the service to start, when a woman sitting nearby said, "Susan?"
I was thrilled to see my friend, Lisa, from my former life. (You know- the life you had before kids when you'd go out with other couples and DO things.)
Lisa and Paul were one of the fun couples we met when we were first married, and the four of us used to get together for dinner, invite each other to soirees, etc. They are one of those GREAT couples- laid-back, down-to-earth, fun. Never pretentious. Always kind and welcoming. Of course, once we all had kids we lost touch. The evenings out stopped altogether- you know how it goes. But we had been seeing them around church in the past two years, and this was a very happy surprise, because Paul had always been steadfast in his disbelief and complete disinterest in all things God. Something had changed for him, and he was attending church regularly with Lisa and their son.
Then about six months ago my DH ran into Paul after church and Paul told him how things had been tough for them lately. He said he had injured himself at work (he is a fire-fighter), that Lisa had battled breast cancer, and that he had been struggling with a drug addiction. This was all shocking news, but it was OK- Lisa was in remission. Paul had defeated the addiction and was leading a ministry for drug addicts at our church. It was exciting stuff.
So as I chatted with Lisa yesterday, I inquired, "How's Paul?"
Her expression went blank and she said, "I wouldn't know. We're divorcing."
A punch in the face would have made less of an impact on me.
WHAT?
"He relapsed. He's fallen back into his addiction."
I was baffled. "But I thought he was past that! I thought he was leading the addiction ministry here at church!"
She just looked sad - so sad- and said, "He was using the whole time."
Cue the music to the opening worship song, and I give her a quick hug and an "I'm so sorry."
And then I'm supposed to turn around and PRAISE THE LORD.
But I couldn't. I just stood there fighting tears and hoping she couldn't see.
Poor Lisa. Poor 8 year old son.
Poor Paul. I'll admit- I was angry with him for a little while. But who the heck am I kidding? I can't even get off caffeine!!! (Seriously- I can't.) I'm in no position to judge him.
And I'm certainly not mad at God or anything silly like that. But I am so, so sad for them.
Sorry guys. Buzz-kill.

heavy stuff

2008-03-27T10:51:00.000-07:00

I had decided not to write about my relationship with my mother-in-law here. It is a story that is too long, too convoluted, too reminiscent of a really bad soap opera.
But then I was talking with the play-group gals the other day and realized that bad blood between girls and their MILs is an epidemic- not my little personal problem.
I certainly didn't bring up the topic, having realized long ago that bad-mouthing my MIL was not OK, no matter how "justified" I felt. But one of the other girls brought up her mother-in-law's recent visit, and a I noticed a collective tightening of jaw muscles and small sighs (and a few eye rolls.)
I had to ask, "Does anyone here have a good relationship with your mother-in-law?"
There was silence. Finally one brave soul said, "Actually, yes. I hate to even admit it because I know that most people don't, but I'm very lucky. I just adore my MIL. She is so sweet, and such a help with the kids."
So, 1 out of 9 had something nice to say. And these AREN'T nasty women. They are a sweet, church-going group who are not catty in the least. Really lovely women.
I have to ask: Why?
Really, I want to know why this happens. I don't think any MILs start out on their sons' wedding days with a wicked chuckle, "Now, my pretty, you're in for it!"
And I don't think any of us daughters-in-law start out thinking, "He's mine now, lady. You're history."
But it happens. I know that my case has special circumstances- bipolar disorder (no, not me) is a serious and difficult mental illness- especially when the person who has it won't treat it.
But as we talked, the other moms and I made some interesting, and sad, revelations about our mothers-in-law. We didn't bitch. We didn't bash. We shared our stories, and our thoughts, and tried to puzzle out how this relationship, that should be so special, has turned so sour.
Ann talked about her husband's own strained relationship with his mom, and how she had spent years trying to mend it, even forging birthday and Mother's Day cards that he refused to sign. She told about the most recent incident when her MIL brought her sister-in-law a HUGE floral arrangement on Easter and quite pointedly gave her nothing. She said she's fed up.
Katherine said that her MIL is not so overt, but is full of thinly veiled criticisms poured on with syrup on top, "Oh, dear, that roast is SUCH an improvement over the one you made last time. You're starting to get the hang of the kitchen now!" or "Will is doing SO much better now that he goes to school. That teacher is really helping him thrive."
Lori told about the time her MIL came to "help" her after she gave birth to her twins. She said the help was not so helpful, and in the end she cooked every meal while her MIL said things like, "Dear, don't you worry about a thing- I'll watch these two (babies sleeping) so you can tidy up/ cook/ run some laundry." Lori was only 2 weeks post-delivery!!
Kendra shared that her MIL was always critical and stand-offish until finally after a disagreement about where a holiday would be spent she screamed, "You stole my son! You stole my son from me!"
And I? I told one of my earliest MIL memories. It was the first time my MIL visited our new house- we were so proud of it- and totally rearranged our furniture, and our kitchen cabinets, while we slept. No regard for the fact that this was OUR home, and OUR belongings, and OUR arrangement. She acted like she had done us the biggest favor in the world. "I just thought it looked so much better like this." Being passive-aggressive, I didn't say a word until 10 years later, though it crushed my little newly-wed feelings at the time.
We tried to identify the root of these issues. One seemed clear- often our MILs felt that we had somehow damaged their relationships with their sons. We examined that notion. A few of us felt that accusation had some truth, if you ponder the way we, as wives, do have a tendency to alter family traditions and holidays, exert our own influence over our husbands, etc. But on the whole, we all said that the mother-son relationships were damaged before our marriages. My husband told me on our first date that he had come to the South to get away from his family- especially his mom. Kendra said that from day one her husband never wanted to talk to his mom on the phone, and she always had to cover. Lori said her husband constantly rolled his eyes behind his mom's back, told her that his mom drove him nuts, dreaded visits, etc.
So part of the relational break-down seems to be occurring before the marriage even starts. I guess the wives are an easy and convenient place to lay blame.
I think a big part of this happens because we moms need to have a major shift in how we relate to our sons as our sons become men, and this is surely hard to do. Young men/men need to feel respected, not mother-henned. That's not to say that they don't still appreciate some "mothering" in the form of a home-cooked meal or a listening ear, but they don't seem to appreciate nagging, or bossing, or being fussed at. I don't look forward to making this transition with Brother, but I am determined to pull it off. I shudder to think that he would dread my phone call or visit the way my husband dreads his mother.
I have also already written a letter to him and his wife-to-be that I will present to them on the eve of their wedding. It basically says that as his mother, I emphatically believe that the most important woman in his life is his wife, and that her needs and wishes must come before mine. That applies to where to live, where to spend holidays, how to raise children, which recipe to use for spaghetti sauce, etc. It was hard to write now, and he's only 22 months old. I know it will be hard to read 20+ years from now, but I am determined to give them that freedom, rooted in Scripture, and get myself out of the way of their happiness. That is not to say that I will tell him I'm out of his life- on the contrary. My hope is that in establishing myself as #2, I will create a sense of easiness for him and my future daughter-in-law that will make them want to be in my company.

So, I'm curious. What do you think? Why does this important relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law (or mother and son) so often go sour?

unplugged is cool

2008-03-26T18:18:00.001-07:00

I really liked going unplugged. A lot.
I read. I cooked. I organized a massive number of toys, and ended up with 3 huge bins to sell/ give away. (That took the better part of a day.)
I played with my kids. I visited family.
I read. A book. (Two, actually.) Oh, did I already say that? Well, it bears repeating, because I REALLY enjoyed it. And I'm working on a third.
And now I'm thinking... reassessing how I spend my time.
It's not that I don't like this little blog. I do. I have really enjoyed it. But it has come at a cost.
I'm not ditching (yet.)

Hope you had a great Easter. I'm going to go catch up on YOUR blog! :-)

quickly...

2008-03-20T10:59:00.001-07:00

A short post to tell you:
1- I am signing off for a long weekend because DH is going to be home tomorrow and Monday and I want to spend the time with him and the kids. I'm going "unplugged" for FOUR DAYS! Wow.
2- Happy, happy Easter. He is Risen! Hallelujah!

:-)

Major diapering violation

2008-03-19T17:24:00.000-07:00

Last night I fell into bed about 30 minutes before the DH, utterly pooped. He came in a little before 11:00. Thus, when Brother started crying (hard) at about 11:15, I felt OK asking DH to go check on him. (I NEVER ask him to do this, but I figured he wasn't as sleep-grogged as I was, having just come to bed.) Apparently I was mistaken.
As DH walked out of our bedroom, I called, "Please check his diaper!"
Through the monitor I heard sounds of DH reassuring Brother, diaper changing sounds, and then quiet. Blessed quiet.
When DH came back, I asked, "Was he wet?"
"No," mumbled DH.

We all slept through the rest of the night. When Brother called me at 6:30 (his usual time) I went in and was overpowered by the smell of urine. I quickly realized that he was drenched- his PJs were soaked and there was a huge yellow stain on his sheet. And then I noticed that he was holding one of the little velcro thingies that holds the sides of the diaper closed.
I was befuddled. How did he get that? He can't take his PJs off yet (I don't think) and he was all zipped up- HOW did he get that?
I picked him up to change his diaper/clothes when I found the incriminating evidence. One side of Brother's diaper was MISSING a velcro thingie, and the diaper was wide open on that side.
That explained the urine leakage. I pondered how this could have happened and decided that Brother must have reached down in the night during DH's ministrations and ripped off the velcro piece without DH's knowledge. DH really must be more aware.

This evening as I was cooking dinner, I mentioned it to DH. He got a strange, smirky expression and said (in a guilty/laughing tone), "Oh. Hmmm. I thought I tucked it in tight enough."
WHAT?
Apparently he was QUITE aware that Brother had ripped off the velcro piece, but was TOO FREAKIN' LAZY to get another diaper and change him again. So, he did a man-job on the diaper and just "tucked" one piece into the other on the side. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, I slapped him. OK- just on the arm, but I mean, SERIOUSLY! Do you find this type of diapering acceptable in a Dad of 3+ years?
I am still in disbelief. I have decided that DH should continue to change nighttime diapers until he MASTERS the skill.

What do you eat?

2008-03-18T11:19:00.000-07:00

Have you seen these images? I received them through a chain email. They are funny, fascinating, and slightly disturbing, all at once. (And often humbling.) The title of the email was "What do you eat?" and it appears to be a look at a family's food intake over a period of about a week. I'm not sure which countries are represented (though I can guess most of them.) Can you pick out the North Americans? (Look for the ones with the largest quantity of unhealthy, processed foods.)

What would be on your family's table?

I'm afraid that in spite of my new focus on healthy foods, there would still be far too much processed, boxed, sugary stuff on our table.

And if anyone knows the source of these images, please do say so! I know there must be some photographer or organization who has gotten ripped off as people have forwarded and forwarded these images without giving anyone any credit.

EDITED TO ADD: Thank you to Shannon of Some Fine Taters who knew from whence the images sprang! They are from a Time photo essay, and before that are from photographer Peter Menzel's book, Hungry Planet. (I'm buying it. First of all, I think it's a great concept, and second, I think it will be a wonderful tool to use when teaching my children about other cultures, food and nutrition, poverty and plenty, etc.) Check out the Time photo gallery- it has some other really cool shots.

the answers

2008-03-17T13:46:00.000-07:00

In response to recent comments:

1. No, I did not know FinSlippy was BIG-TIME blogger. Duh. If there is anyone else I should be reading, please do let me know.
2. Regarding living with my brother and his family for two years, yes I would do it again. The idea actually took root in Europe. My brother and his wife both studied over there in college (Italy and Spain, respectively) and my DH and I took a 2-week trip to Northern Italy before we started having kids. Going abroad was a life-changing experience for all of us. Each of us came back to the states impressed by the way many Europeans seem to embrace family (even extended family) and often share housing. It is no big deal over there. We thought, why not? In America, when we told people what we were doing, we were met with shock (are you serious???), anxiety (but you'll all have a huge falling out and hate each other forever!)- that one mostly from other family, and ridicule (you're nuts- better you than me!). Every now and then, people were open to the idea and thought it was wise financially, would be fun, etc.
Of course, not caring what people thought, we went on with our plan and it was fun, and HOPEFULLY financially wise. There was something magical about having babies born and raised under our shared roof. (Clarification: not literally born under that roof. I'm a hospital kind of girl!) We helped each other, we encouraged each other, we laughed together and watch each other morph into parents. Naturally, there were times that it wasn't easy. I'd say lack of privacy was the biggest issue- that and differing ideas of what "clean" means. But it was definitely worth it.
OK. I'd love to think of some really poignant thing to say now. Or something really funny. But actually, I'm really tired, and Sister is sick, and I just want to crawl under the covers and turn off this computer. So... later.

ha ha ha ha ha

2008-03-14T18:45:00.000-07:00

I am so excited. I just found an awesome blog, Finslippy, which it not new, but is new to me. As I read I realized I liked her style so much because she reminds me of Beck. So, of course I loved her. Anyway, I followed a link to this post which talks about the California homeschooling ruling.
Oh. my. goodness. I laughed so hard I cried. CRIED! Laughed and cried so hard I couldn't even read it aloud to my husband and he had to come take the laptop and read for himself.
And please know I am not disrespecting you homeschoolers. I admire you tremendously and may be one myself one day. (Undecided, there.)
But it's funny. Really funny.
PS- It doesn't get funny to the 4th paragraph, so don't get bogged down in the facts. Keep on.
Happy Saturday!

real estate stuff. kind of boring, but hey, why not read it anyway?

2008-03-14T12:27:00.000-07:00

I have mentioned several times that we recently moved. The whole story is that we moved out of a house that we designed, built, and shared with my brother and sister-in-law for two years as a real estate investment. (When I say built, I mean that the boys acted as the contractors- we didn't literally build it.) While it was sometimes difficult to share the house (which had a normal floor-plan; one den, one kitchen, etc.) with another family, it was wonderful too. Our kids are really close (they think they're siblings) and my children, especially Sister, got a wonderful opportunity to develop a tight realationship with her aunt and uncle. It was also great because my sister-in-law (SIL) and I split the chores, cooking, etc. There's nothing quite like sitting on your fanny all afternoon and then walking into the kitchen to find a hot, delicious meal sitting on the table. I felt like a man! (I have often thought that Sigmund Freud had the "penis envy" thing all wrong. It's not the penis itself we envy *ewwww! gross!* it's all the priviledges that come with the penis! Like sitting on your fanny until dinnertime. Or laying in the bed sleeping in the middle of the night while the baby cries and mommy goes to check- "I just don't hear him as fast as you do!" Sheesh.)
Anyway, we agreed to share the house for two years and then sell it, split the profit, and go our separate ways. (Hoping to make enough money so that we each can build our own houses.) DH and I moved out because we have SO MUCH STUFF (junk) that was cluttering the house. Now that we're out of there, it looks so much nicer! We're going to rent the place we're in until we sell the house.
Of course, since we embarked on this little investment, the real estate market as tanked. Naturally. But we are staying optimistic and hope that we can still eke out some profit, considering the "sacrifice" we made. (The biggest being sharing our bedroom with Brother until he was 20 months old! That wasn't easy.)
Anyway, now we're in the process of interviewing realtors. Not exactly fun. I like meeting them, but I always feel bad because I know that when it's all over, we can only choose one and have to turn the others down. I hate stuff like that- good thing my DH handles the "call people and tell them bad news" department. It's especially hard because we have a good friend from college who is one of the realtors we interviewed, but he really just isn't as good as the others. The other realtors we've spoken to are much more dymanic, have strong marketing plans, etc. The college friend is sweet, but he's just not in the same league. So that's icky, too. This is big money- our family's financial future. As much as we'd love to give College Friend the business, we've GOT to sell this house. So... ick.
Aynway, I'll try not to bore you to death with real estate talk, but that's what's been consuming me for the last few days. Keep your fingers crossed for us!

Wardrobe Re-Do: Episode 1

2008-03-12T11:15:00.000-07:00

Wardrobe Challenge: Build from a Favorite
If you are reading this, you likely read my post the other day where I whined about the current state of my wardrobe: ill-fitting, uncool, lacking in the "dressy" department, etc. So, I am going to spend the Spring doing a "wardrobe re-do." I think how you dress does say a lot about you, and certainly affects the way you feel. (At least it affects me.) But, I don't exactly have unlimited funds (!) so I'm going to have to be creative and frugal with this project. My first area of focus is to choose items (clothing, shoes, jewelry, etc.) that I already own and really like but never wear. The rule is that the item has to fit and be something I could wear if only I had the right pieces to match.

I received this necklace as a gift from my mother-in-law while I was pregnant with my daughter. It was one of the rare moments my MIL felt like being nice to me- but that is a long, sad story and not for today. Anyway, I really like the necklace and it is special to me because I associate it with my "miracle" pregnancy. (Another long story, but happy!, so I will tell that one another time.) It's strung with tiny pearls and pretty beads and the flowers are hand-blown glass. But I've never worn it because it doesn't "go" with anything I've got in terms of wardrobe. Length-wise it falls right at the bottom of my throat, so it doesn't sit on top of a shirt very nicely. It needs a lower cut or open-collar style of top, but it also needs pastels because of the colors in the necklace.

So, this necklace is my first challenge. I am going to be working on building an outfit I love around it in the next few weeks. My budget for this project is $50. (I won't usually allocate such a "big" budget but I'm thinking that this will be a "dressy" outfit- maybe even for Easter! So...) Wish me luck.

Oh- and if you want to play too, just choose something you own (and love) but never wear and do likewise! Blog about it and link a post in the comments, or just do it on your own for fun. You never know what "hidden treasures" you'll find in your closet!

prayer request

2008-03-10T18:11:00.001-07:00

I was skimming through my blog favorites tonight and was shocked by Mary Beth's post at Salt and Chocolate. She had been off the radar for a little while and now I know why: her 16-month old son, Rainer, has been diagnosed with leukemia. So, could you:
1- Pop over there and leave her an encouraging comment?
2- Add Rainer to your prayer list?
I can only imagine how it would feel to find out that one of my children was facing such a disease- not only the fear of losing them but also the ordeal of the treatment (3 years in Rainer's case.) I know I would want everyone on the planet praying for us. So, please say a prayer for little Rainer tonight (and his parents, who probably need it even more than he does at this moment.)
Thanks, friends.

Springtime to-dos

2008-03-08T16:24:00.000-08:00

I'm having a fit of spring cleaning. Well, I'm not actually cleaning, yet. Remember my post about my hulking mental energy? Well, I'm doing some SERIOUS mental energizing in this area. I'm making some big plans. Shall I list them for you? Yes, I shall- so you can catch a glimpse of this tremendous mental energy at work.

Things to do/accomplish/act the martyr about in the next two months:

1- Hire a yard man to come de-snake the backyard. Yes, friends. I said snake. It was black, and two feet long, and it came out and hissed at us while we were on the swingset. And I am NOT going back out there with my kids until all the dead leaves have been bagged up. (If you wonder why the man I married can't be the "yard man" it's because a) he is extremely busy with work and other things and b) he isn't exactly a "country boy." When we found the snake he tried to act like it wasn't his job to kill it. I had to remind him that he was the adult in the house with a penis, and thus responsible for all things wild-animal-related. I mean, please... it's right there on the responsibility list next to "take out smelly trash" and "lift heavy things." He was like, "You could hit it with a hoe the same as me." As if!

2- ORGANIZE THE TOYS! Oh my goodness, if I don't do this soon I'm going to lose my mind. Ever since the move, the toys have been a huge jumble spread throughout the house in a constant mess. I clean it all up every day but I think the root of the problem is that we have way too many toys out. I used to put some away and rotate them (worked beautifully) but I haven't implemented that system in the new house. We also have got sets all scrambled up, spread out, etc. The problem is that I need several (at least 3) hours without the kids in the house to accomplish the toy re-org. DH promises that over spring break he'll take them out for the morning and let me have time for this chore. I hope so, or I'm going to crack.

3- Locate my art/craft stuff in the garage and unpack! As mentioned previously, it has been tremendously frustrating not being able to access my art supplies. And in addition to wanting access to basic craft stuff (embroidery floss, adhesives, acrylic paints, etc.), I've got a bug to scrapbook again. So, getting all my stuff out is a big priority.

4- Get a grip on my wardrobe. It's time. Recently I had to attend a funeral::actually, I had to sing at the funeral- that's a tough gig, let me tell you. Anyway, I had a near break-down over what to wear. I have NOTHING nice to wear anymore. I guess it's been almost 4 years since I had to wear anything other than jeans, pants, etc. on a regular basis, and the "nice" clothes I wore in my pre-mommy days are looking dated and, ahem, somewhat tight. Thank goodness my ONE nice outfit (bless that elastic waist skirt) was black, and thus appropriate for funeral attire. Of course, I had another crisis when I realized neither of my two pairs of black shoes (Danskos, strappy black high heels) were going to be appropriate for a funeral in February. Crisis averted by my sister-in-law who loaned me a pair of her shoes (really cute black beaded pumps) but I realized that my wardrobe is in VERY BAD SHAPE! I am formulating an action plan and will discuss this in a future post.

5- Lose 10 pounds. Oh, my. There is is in black and white. I am determined to lose some weight. Specifically, 10 pounds by Memorial Day (May 31.) I don't know where the cookie dough addiction is going to fit into these plans, but I know I have GOT to get rid of the spare tire around my middle. I know the extra 10 lbs. is directly related to the frumpy wardrobe, and I've got to address both at the same time. I told my husband the plan, and his face lit up and he said, "What can I do to help?" I told him that he could help by not mentioning anything to me about what I'm eating, whether I'm exercising, etc. but that he could certainly remark if I looked thinner. I CAN'T STAND to be on a diet and have him go, "Should you be drinking that coke?" AAAAHHHHH! It makes me want to eat the most fattening thing I can think of right in front of him, for some odd reason.

6- Collect healthier recipes. This ties in with number 5. I really don't believe in diets- more in lifestyle/dietary changes that are for the long haul. I've recently started eating whole wheat bread (yes, I'm about 10 years behind the rest of the world) and am trying to eat more fresh fruits and veggies. I also need to collect more recipes that are yummy but also lower in fat, sodium, etc. It seems like most of my recipes call for heavy cream, or loads of butter and cheese, etc. If I find some good ones, I'll post them here.

So, want to help me out? I am seeking:

Good ideas for storing/organizing toys and ways to help small children learn to clean up
Healthy recipes

Thanks in advance for your help. (My DH hates when I say this- "Honey, I'm thanking you in advance because I know you're going to remember to take out the trash tonight." You can imagine the syrupy sweet smile that goes with it. Hey, it's better than nagging, right? OK- maybe it's the same as nagging.)

Recipe::Santa Fe Skillet

2008-03-07T17:24:00.000-08:00

This is a recipe I promised Jennifer after I read that she was in a (minor) cooking slump. Been there, sister. This is my favorite one-skillet meal. It's really good and actually is pretty healthy too. And, miracle of miracles, my picky eaters actually love this one!

Santa Fe Skillet (it used to be called something lame like chicken-salsa skillet but that wasn't festive enough for me)
Ingredients:
package of boneless chicken breasts
2 cups instant rice
jar of salsa
can of chicken broth (I use low-sodium)
can of black beans (drained)
can of corn (drained)
cheddar cheese (grated- I use almost a whole block!)

Directions:
1. Wash the chicken and cut it up into small bite-size pieces. Set aside.
2. Grate the cheese.
3. In a large pan, cook the chicken pieces until done. (I put a small amount of oil first.)
4. When chicken is done, add the can of chicken broth, salsa, corn, and black beans. Stir and let come to a boil.
5. When boiling, add the rice (2 cups) and stir.
6. Top with grated cheese, turn off heat, and cover with lid. Let stand for 5 minutes, covered.

This makes a really yummy, cheesy southwestern style meal. I like it with chips but my husband likes it on a tortilla with a little lettuce and sour cream. Two additional notes:
*When I'm out of instant rice, I just cook a pot of rice, only add about 1/3 the can of broth for flavor, and stir cooked rice into the mix instead of instant rice. I think it's even yummier that way, but the instant rice is fine.
* I keep threatening to shred the chicken. I don't like "chunks" in my food. Gee, I wonder where Brother gets his picky eating habits?

more mini-swap mania

2008-03-05T13:00:00.000-08:00

First off, thanks so much for all the great advice regarding my picky eaters. I'm going to do my best to respond personally to those of you who commented on my last post. Just knowing that others have faced the same problem and end up with healthy, non-growth-stunted children years later is a big relief.

So, would you like to see what we sent Kate and her boys for mini-swap? Yes, of course you would!
Here it is!

I went with a pirate theme. Kate told me that her boys weren't all that into pirates, but for some reason I just couldn't get the pirates idea out of my mind. I tried, but then I'd see something like a tube of plastic pirates at the craft store, or come across a bag of chocolate coins at the farmer's market, etc. So, pirates it was. First, I pulled out two plain chipboard boxes that I've had forever and painted them with pirate images. (One box for each boy.)

You can see Maurice the pubescent pirate monkey on the side of Caleb's box. I think the goatee makes him look rather dashing, don't you?
Then I worked on filling up the boxes with booty. Boody? Bounty? Whatever.

Here is a look at the contents of one of the boxes. Included were glass marbles, a scarf and felt eyepatch (for dress-up), gold chocolate coins, a ring pop, plastic pirates, a stuffed lizard, and some felt finger-puppets I made.

Now, about these finger puppets. I must say, I am a little ashamed of them because they are glued instead of sewn. They sat on my counter for almost two weeks waiting to be sewn together but I never could find my embroidery floss! Drat the disorganized garage! I haven't unpacked my crafting stuff since we moved (it's driving me nuts, but there is always something more pressing to do- like find the box of tax stuff or de-crud the pots and pans in the sink.)

So, having had a fit of rage in the garage to no avail (though I did manage to throw a piece of plywood halfway across the garage- quite impressive, I think) I ran to Wal-Mart at the last minute to buy some new floss. But as usual, that was a frustrating experience. They have stopped selling embroidery floss, as the very surly Wal-Mart employee told me after I searched for 20 minutes. I didn't have time to get to the far, far away craft store, so I had to settle with glue. Oh, well.

I also included two pirate-y shirts I found at the thrift store (ladies shirts- but very pirate-y, I must say) and two treasure bottles. I found that idea on Family Fun- here it is. You fill a clear drink bottle with rice and little treasures, such as jewels, shells, glitter, etc. We also made some pirate-themed shrinky dink charms. (Which was LOADS of fun- I love shrink plastic!!!) You'll have to look at Kate's blog to see those, as I never got a decent photo. In fact, none of my photos are decent because I only remembered to photograph it all in the dark of night as I was loading the box.

I think the best part of this swap is that I now have one of Brother's future birthday parties 85% planned. I am a multi-tasking queen.

OK, no big wrap-up to this post. Gotta go and get something done while Brother naps!

Sending out an SOS... (Imagine Sting singing it- it's better that way)

2008-03-05T04:50:00.000-08:00

Help.
I am having some serious struggles with picky eaters in my house.
And just so you know, I have already done a lot of homework on this issue. I have read several books, talked to my pediatrician, discussed it with the playgroup mom crew, etc. And here's where I am:
I am not an overly-permissive parent (at all), but I have decided that our dinner table cannot be a battle zone. We've been down that road too many times, and I'm not up for it. My sweet husband (bushed from a day of being a principal) isn't' up for it. It's not good for our family morale. And every "expert" I talk to (or read) advises against forcing kids to eat foods they don't want. From my own childhood experience, I'd have to agree. We were made to eat vegetables as children, and now my brother and I have strong aversions to many of those same vegetables. In fact, the only way you will get a green pea in my mouth is to stuff it into my cold, dead body.
Some of my most vivid childhood memories involve my father and brother's nightly dinnertime stand-off over my brother cleaning his plate. Being the obedient, older child, one stern glance from my father would have me stuffing my entire vegetable serving into my mouth and swallowing them without chewing, chased by a big gulp of milk. But not my brother- he would sit there for a good hour having a stare-down with my dad. Dad always won, but it wasn't pretty. (And then there was the scene the night my dad found a big wad of chewed-up green beans in the bathroom trashcan.) I used to feel so sorry for my brother, but now that I'm a parent, I feel retrospective sympathy for my poor dad. There he was, after a hard day at the office, wanting only the recliner and newspaper, faced with my defiant brother and a plate of peas. He did what he thought was right, but it seems the end result was that he rasied a boy who became a man who hates vegetables.
I am determined that my children eat (mostly) healthy foods. I'm not a nut about it- some goldfish or animal crackers here and there don't stress me out, if they have been eating the healthy stuff too. But I really do want them to develop healthy habits- healthier than mine were as a child/adolescent.
I have tried to "put the healthy food on their plate and just let them choose what they want." It doesn't work very well at my house. Here is what happens. Brother (21 months) will look at a plate with tiny bites of roast beef, small pieces of fresh green bean, small pieces of whole wheat french bread, and watermelon bites. He will fuss that he wants the meat off the tray. We say something like, "It's OK. Just let it stay there." He will then proceed to eat every bite of watermelon and holler for more. We say, "Eat your other foods first!" He then says "No no!" and makes swiping motions at the beans and roast. He will half-heartedly eat a few bites of bread, drink some milk, and then ask again for watermelon.
Here's my question- what would you do next? We have tried holding the watermelon hostage until other foods are tasted. It results in a lot of crying and no more food is eaten.
We have tried making him stay in the chair until other foods are tasted. It results in a lot of crying and no more food is eaten.
We have tried keeping him from a favorite activity (watching Elmo on TV) until he tastes the other foods. It results in a lot of crying and no more food is eaten.
So, my friends, any suggestions???
Sister is getting (a little) easier now that she's 3 and 1/2 because we can reason with her a bit, hold out on sweets and snacks, etc. But the almost-2-year-old-boy is my challenge.
I would appreciate any and all advice. And if you do post a reply in the comments, check back because I may ask you a follow-up question there. Thanks!

Mini-Swap Mania!

2008-03-03T17:35:00.000-08:00

We received our mini-swap package from Kate and her boys today. In fact, the timing was perfect. The afternoon was growing long, and I was having a serious sinking spell (Southern Belle style.) Suddenly DH walked in the door and called, "You've got a package!" Immediately I knew: mini-swap!

Kate did not disappoint! In fact, her box was so full of goodies, I'm a little worried that ours will look slim to her. We opened the box to find three beautiful linen bags. I must go on about these bags for a moment: they are so pretty, and so practical, and they have ribbons sewn into the seam so you can always tie them closed. Fabulous! I know they will get much use throughout the upcoming years. In fact, I think this is a brilliant idea for "wrapping" a gift- practical, reusable, beautiful. My family might start getting presents wrapped in pretty fabric bags.

There was a bag for Sister, a bag for Brother, and a bag for them to share. Sister immediately pulled out her first gift- a Cinderella set that included a small doll with two dresses. She was in Heaven. Brother pulled out a package of Thomas the Train stickers. He screamed with delight. It was funny, because I really think had that been all there was, they would have both been totally satisfied! But Kate had done lots more than that, and before it was over, we had unwrapped a collection of books, bubbles, Play-Doh, sunglasses, stickers, coloring books with scented crayons, trains, and my personal favorite- a brownie mixture in a jar with two ADORABLE homemade aprons. Sister's was made of Disney princess fabric, and Brother's was made of Thomas fabric. They are absolutely precious! Brother loved his so much that he wore it until bedtime.

So, from our end, mini-swap was a huge success. Kate was a terrific partner and I can only hope that our package brings smiles to her boys' faces too.

Thanks, Kate! I'll swap with you again anytime!

coolness::gone

2008-03-01T04:26:00.000-08:00

The other day my SIL (Sister-in-law) and I were sitting together talking about how cool we used to be in our college days. Sort of like, "I know I'm not cool now, but I used to be cool. I had really cool clothes, and I listened to cool music. Very cool..."
My brother heard us and he said, "Um, I hate to tell you this, but the fact that you're having this conversation means neither of you were ever cool."
I told him to shut up, of course. (My duty as his older sister.)
Anyway, I was thinking about my former coolness, and how it has utterly departed from me. I devised a little top ten list for your enjoyment. Do you recognize yourself in any of these items? Anything you want to add?

You know you aren’t cool anymore when…

10.You go out to eat but don’t enjoy your meal because the restaurant is “too loud.”
9. You barely watch TV anymore because all the shows are too “trashy.” You realize that the morals of your generation far surpass those of the current younger generation.
8. You order all of your clothes from catalogs you once scorned, such as L.L. Bean and Eddie Bauer.
7. Teenagers are listening to music you listened to when you were a teenager because it’s “retro” and cool again.
6. Comfort has surpassed aesthetics when purchasing shoes. (I swear, my feet look like mushrooms in the Danskos I wear. Ask me if I care.)
5. You wonder why anyone would spend an evening in a crowded, noisy bar when they could be sitting at home watching “Seinfeld” reruns in their pajamas.
4. You catch yourself calling young people like the bag boy at the grocery store “honey.”
3. The check-out girl hasn’t carded you in years.
2. When a good-looking guy smiles in your direction at the grocery store, you know that a) it’s not sexual and b) you could care less.
Note: He’s actually smiling at your baby.
1. Most of your anecdotes for your top ten list seem to occur at the grocery store.

:-) Hope you all have a very cool weekend!

Pete Seeger

2008-02-28T10:49:00.001-08:00

I was so tired last night, but I got sucked into a program on ETV about the life of folk musician, Pete Seeger. I had heard of him before, and am familiar with some of his songs, but had no idea what a fascinating life he has led. I would now count myself as a big fan, and I really want to hear a lot more of his music. (The first three songs on my music widget are all Pete Seeger songs- though not performed by him.)
I was really struck by the way he has used music to draw people to a cause, such as civil rights, war protests, or saving the environment. Whether you agree with his politics or not, you have to admire his dedication to peace and non-violence and his love for his country. He was the driving force behind cleaning up the Hudson River and was the founder of the Clearwater movement. If you can, do try to catch the program. It's good stuff. Here's one of my favorite quotes- (I think this was in response to being called a liberal.)
"I like to say I'm more conservative than Goldwater. He just wanted to turn the clock back to when there was no income tax. I want to turn the clock back to when people lived in small villages and took care of each other."
I think I'm with him on that one.
It's interesting- there is something afoot these days in our culture. It's been around for a while, but only on the fringe, never mainstream. But it's gaining momentum, and people are talking, and making changes. Even big business is starting to take note. I can't put my finger on one word to describe it, but I think you will know what I mean. It's that feeling that things aren't quite right. That, hey! I don't want to feed my kids pesticides anymore. And, hey! What is all this plastic JUNK doing in my house? And, hey! Maybe natural medicine IS better! And, hey! Why am I spending my evenings watching TV programs about other people living life instead of actually living my own? (Exception: Pete Seeger program. :- It actually inspired me to live my life- better.) And, hey! Maybe I don't WANT to be available all the time via email, IM, phone, Blackberry, etc.
Maybe the word is natural. Or green. Or unplugged. I'm not sure- but it definitely is here, and gathering on the horizion like a thundercloud, and I like it. I see it in other people's blogs, like Jennifer's and Rebecca's and Jade's. I see it at the grocery store in all the new organic products. I see it in my own life as I make choices with new guiding parameters. (Is this natural? Is this worthwhile? Is this helpful or harmful- to us, to our world?) I'm definitely no Soule Mama yet, but I'm a lot closer than I was a year ago.
Interesting stuff, friends.

linky linky

2008-02-26T10:40:00.000-08:00

No time to talk. Working on mini-swap and having so much fun! But I'll send you some linky love. Here are 3 sites that I have enjoyed this week.
1. Blumchen- Check out that Easter goodness! Oh, my, get out the credit card!
2. Bento Corner- This is such a fun way to eat lunch. Great Japanese concept to make healthy food appealing, but I'm afraid Sister won't go for the seaweed.
3. Rebecca Sower's reflections on going unplugged for a day. I love this idea. I think I'm going to try doing it on Sundays. (We really want to attempt a Sabbath around here- so far it isn't happening but I haven't given up.) One thing that stood out to me in Rebecca's entry was how she realized that in the absence of TV, phone, internet, etc. she did a lot of thinking. She says, "And I realized that more than stealing our creative time, all these 'gadgets' might also be stealing our thoughts, our ability to muse and reflect and dream and ponder."
How much more true for our children, who are in danger of never learning the quiet language of dreaming and pondering in this loud, technological age?
OK, back to mini-swap fun!

Ten Things Making Me Happy This Weekend

2008-02-23T10:11:00.000-08:00

Thanks so much for all the comments you left regarding food allergies (my last post.) You all made great points, and I'm going to do another post about it after I've had a few days to mull things over. Feel free to continue to add comments to that post.

Anyway, I feel that perhaps my blog hasn't had quite enough positive vibing lately, so I'm jumping on Amanda's bandwagon and listing 10 happy things.

1. These drawings by Sister. She suddenly has moved from scribbling, to drawing circles, and now... people! They are just the cutest things ever!

2. A morning to myself. Ahh... so nice. DH took the kids to the park and left me home alone for some "me" time. I worked on the next thing that is making me happy...

3. Mini-swap with Kate. It's coming together! I can't say too much because it's a surprise, but I'll have lots of crafty goodness to share here after next week. I've got a theme going and I'm so excited about it... hope you and the boys like it Kate! (Sneak peek below!)

4. A book swap with Jade. So cool- her kids are an age and gender match with mine. I'm already thumbing through our stacks and picking out some cool reads for them.

5. This photo of Sister's Barbie. Now, people, I want you to understand that nothing about this photograph was staged. As I was cleaning the kitchen this morning, I just came across this lovely scene- a whorishly dressed and disheveled Barbie leaning against the Kleenex box next to the dollhouse toilet. (Guess it was a rough night!) I swear I have no idea how the toilet got there. I fear that Sister's Barbie has been corrupted by Beck's Barbies. And she used to be such a sweet Irish dancer type. Oh, dear.

6. A renewed interest in scrapbooking. I must say that I hate the term "scrapbooking." It sounds really cheesy to me. But I love the idea of documenting life by putting pictures together with writing (memories, stories, descriptions, etc.) and some beautiful art supplies to create a truly special and unique momento. Ali Edwards calls it "life art." Sounds more like it. I've seen some of the new products that just came out and they are making me want to dig my scrapbook stuff out of the garage and get back to it. Specifically, I'm loving:
Jenni Bowlin's stuff
Heidi Swapp's new stuff (always love Heidi)

K& Company line featuring Land of Nod artist

Sassafras Lass papers- digging those robots and those adorable owls!

7. This awesome free butterfly applique for a shirt for Sister. (Heck- me too!) It's from Sandi Henderson and I love it.

8. Health. We're all back in action. Thank you, God.

9. These books that my kids are loving right now. (Me too.)

The Usborne Book of Everyday Words

On Market Street

We are Different, We're the Same (a great Sesame Street book)

10. A really cool "radio" website- Pandora. You can type in an artist or style of music, and they'll play a continuous run of music in that style. It's great background music while you're cooking supper.

Happy weekend, friends!

Food Allergy Wars

2008-02-22T10:44:00.000-08:00

So, the DH is an elementary school principal, and I'm a former elementary teacher, so you can imagine the general topic of our dinner conversation. Anyway, last night DH was telling me about a problem at his school; food allergies. Until now, the general practice (at his school and others in our area) has been to let each teacher handle things in her own room. When I was teaching, one year I had a child with a deadly dairy allergy in my class. Her mom and I talked with all the other parents and worked with the room mom to be sure all snacks and party food were safe for her. Her mom always was good about sending in special snacks, too. It worked great.
But, lately, this system isn't working as well. For one thing, the number of children with serious food allergies has increased rather dramatically (especially peanut allergies.) Why is this? I could go into a serious rant about the GOVERNMENT'S and BIG BUSINESS'S utter failure to protect pregnant mothers, babies, etc. (i.e. lead-laced toys, poisonous plastic baby bottles, trans-fats, etc.) but I won't. You know all that.
Anyway, the other reason that the system is failing is because some people are COMPLETE IDIOTS. Here's the case in point: a 2nd grade child at DH's school has a deadly peanut allergy. Yes, deadly. Just being near any peanut product can cause her throat to swell shut. She must have an Epi-pen on her person at all times. Her mother is very proactive and volunteered to be the room mom for the class in order to be sure that parties and special events were peanut-free. The mom even sent out packets to all of the parents at the beginning of the year with a letter explaining the situation, a photo of her daughter, etc.
Fast-forward to Valentine's Day. Another mom in the class showed up to the class party dressed as a peanut M&M. OK- no big deal, until M&M mom insists on passing out packets of peanut M&Ms to the kids in the class. Room mom politely asks her to stop, reminding M&M mom of her daughter's DEADLY peanut allergy. M&M mom says, "But I have to pass them out- I'm dressed as an M&M!" I have no words to express how I feel about M&M mom (no nice words, at least, so I'll move on.)
Fast forward to yesterday where Room mom meets with my DH and resigns as room mom, in tears of frustration, expressing fear for her daughter's health/safety.
DH doesn't know what to do. Here are his ideas, followed by my responses:
DH:Maybe we should just be a peanut-free school.
Me: You mean people couldn't pack their kid a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch?
DH: Yes.
Me: Horrors! What would Sister eat every day? She would starve!
DH: But what if her peanut butter sandwich could cause another child to become seriously ill or die?
Me: OK, good point. But what about parties?
DH: I'm thinking of having a fruit-only policy for parties.
Me: HORRORS!!! Fruit-only parties? At Christmas? At HALLOWEEN?
DH: It's not like the kids need the candy, you know.
Me: Of course they don't NEED candy, but sweets are what make life worth living when you're a kid. You can't forbid that- it's too cruel!
DH: (exasperated) Then what do you suggest?
Me: (after a few moments of thinking) What if you sent out a list of pre-approved treats people can buy at the store, like packaged Rice Krispy Treats and stuff like that. Then kids can still have some sweet stuff at parties, and you eliminate the risk of homemade goods, etc.
DH: Maybe. That's a thought. I'm going to ask the leadership teacher team and see what they think. It's a big problem.

So, I'm asking you, dear reader. What do you think is a fair solution? I'd appreciate your ideas.
Edited to add: If any of you have schools or school districts with good policies in place regarding food allergies, could you email me at amamaonamission.gmail.com? I think our district is way behind the times (as usual.) Thanks!

will it never end?

2008-02-20T14:38:00.000-08:00

Um, we're still sick. Specifically, Brother.
I will be back tomorrow or the next day (hopefully!)
In the meantime, if you haven't already explored this site, check it out.
Too cool. (Especially if you have older children with time on their hands!)

Frozen Grand Central

2008-02-19T07:24:00.001-08:00

New York is such a weird city. I love it. I hate it. Check out this little piece of performance art.

deep thoughts from the bathroom floor

2008-02-17T18:17:00.000-08:00

I'm alive.
Man. I don't think I've been that stomach-sick since I contracted food poisoning in college. (Um, could that have possibly been 13 years ago? Yikes.)
Sitting there in the bathroom floor with my so-sick little boy, two thoughts occurred to me.
1- God BLESS single mothers. I really don't know how they do it. In our society I often perceive an undercurrent of hostility toward single mothers as if they have somehow committed a grievous sin to cause them to end up in their situation, and consequently, are not worthy of support or sympathy. They often seem to bear invisible scarlet letters on their chests- SM. One will hear a woman explaining how life is hard in some way because she is a single mother, and people nod their heads but behind their hands (or in their heads) say "Well, she should have..." fill in the blank:
-waited until marriage to have sex
- made her marriage work
- chosen a better man
- used birth control...
I will admit that at timesI have had similar thoughts. It's easy to fall into the judgment trap. But as I lost my lunch into the toilet and watched my 1-year old boy doing the same in his Daddy's arms, I thought, "There but by the amazing grace of God Almighty go I."
Truly- what would I have done? How would I have cared for him when I was so very ill myself? How would I do so many, many things that I am able to do because I have a wonderful and supportive husband?

2- My second thought was, "Thank you, God, that sickness is our rarity and not our normality." There is a children's hospital in driving distance that is full of very ill children. So rarely do I consider them, or their parents, or pray for them. And what must it be like to have a little one who is so sick- not just for a few days- but for weeks, months, years? It truly is inconceivable to me.

Not cheering thoughts, but grounding ones. God always amazes me. I can be laying half-dead in the bathroom floor and He's still teaching me lessons. Always moving me away from judgment and self-righteousness. Always moving me toward mercy.

Mayday, mayday...

2008-02-15T16:41:00.001-08:00

I'm hit!
Last night Brother and I both went down like the Titanic with Sister's stomach flu.
I'll spare you the details.
DH is last man standing (fingers crossed!)

2008-02-14T09:27:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone.

I wish I had beautiful photos of a Valentine's Day pancake breakfast to post for you, or even shots of the handmade heart-photo wreath I had in mind to make, but alas. All I have to show for myself is a pile of dirty laundry and black rings under my eyes. In fact, if you want to know what I had in mind for today, just read Kate's blog. My plan was almost identical, except I was going to serve roast beef instead of lobster.

I told my DH that I REALLY wanted to hold off and pretend that Valentine's Day was next week. I've been house-bound for 2 days and didn't get a chance to get him anything at all. And I had plans for a romantic meal that we could eat by candlelight after the kids were in bed. But to be honest, I'm just not in the mood.

Drat that man, do you know what he did? He left me a present anyway. I have another (private) family blog full of photos of my kids and little stories about their doings. It's my way of keeping in touch with our spread-out family and recording special childhood moments. I've been keeping it for almost 3 years and it's quite big. Anyway, DH has been covertly copying the blog into Word, re-formatting it, printing it out, and inserting it into sheet protectors in a lovely black scrapbook. Can you believe him?

I was so happy, and also felt like such a loser at the same time. I wish I had thought of such a nice, thoughtful gift for him and had been working on it for weeks, instead of waiting until the last minute.

Before I sink into a full depression, I will share two things making me happy today. One is the packet of art stuff I ordered from this Etsy site. She has so much cool stuff- cool Japanese stuff! It's worth checking out. Brother has been fascinated with all these little pieces for the better part of the day- a huge help while Sister is still so sick.

A closer look at the coolness...

And yesterday I found this site where you can download recordings of old records! I have fond memories of listening to records when I was little, and think it is great for the imagination. But I never knew where to start for my kids- everything is so TV oriented these days. We'll be using the site a lot in the future.

OK- I've got to go make some red jello for Sister. That's as Valentine's-ey as it's going to get around here today.

cupcake tote to the rescue

2008-02-13T07:00:00.000-08:00

Before I begin today's real post, let me just say: You know your little tendency to eat small bites of raw cookie dough has escalated way out of control when you are so desperate for it that you are willing to make it in the bathroom so as not to wake the children from their naps. Seriously, I have a problem. It's those darned pasteurized eggs! Before they sold those at my grocery store, I was always a little scared of getting Salmonella poisioning from the dough, so I'd only take a little taste. But now that there are no worries~! (Aside from weight gain, excessive cholesterol, etc.) I think that I just ate enough dough to equal about 14 cookies. Not good. Not good at all.

Back on topic now:

As mentioned in an earlier post, I was the very lucky winner of Jessica's lovely cupcake tote. The plan was to hide it away when it came in the mail and use it as a V-Day gift for Sister. But, being the absentminded person that I am, when the package came in the mail I forgot about it and wondered aloud (in front of Sister), "Now, what can this be?" We were both intrigued, but when I tore the edge of the envelope and saw the pink strap of the cupcake tote peeking out at me, I jammed the package behind me and said, "Oh! No! Wait! This is a surprise!"

Sister was not happy. She wanted to see the surprise! I explained that it was her Valentine and that she could have it on Valentine's Day, and hid it high in my closet. I stuck to it for a long while too, despite Sister's frequent requests to see her Valentine.

Then Sister started the puking.

As she lay propped on the pillows in my bed yesterday, and after I had given her Tylenol and a cool glass of water, I asked her if there was anything else I could do to make her feel better.

In her weak little voice with tears in her eyes, she said, "Mommy, can I please see my Valentine now?

She was so pitifully sick that I couldn't resist her.

The cupcake tote saved the day. She has carried that thing around ever since. After filling it with several little dolls, she clutched it next to her in bed while watching Mary Poppins, carried it wherever she went, and slept with it at night. (And luckily, the tote bag survived a 2 AM puking session unscathed.)

I think it's safe to say that Sister likes the cupcake tote.

So, thanks Jessica! Now I've just got to figure out some small treat for Sister to receive on V-Day, since she messed up my present!

And I think we will be postponing Valentine's Day celebrations around here until the pukes are gone. The kids won't know the difference, and it's just not that romantic at my house right now. You know?

sick

2008-02-12T11:04:00.000-08:00

Oh, my.
I was just preparing to write a lovely blog post featuring the beautiful cupcake tote I won in the Bloggy Giveaways Contest.
But then Sister woke up from her nap screaming and I went in to find lots of pink throw-up. (Pink because of the Valentine's cupcakes she ate this morning.)
Yuck.
Seems we have been stricken with the bug that's going around our community.
Hope I'll be back tomorrow.

The Power of Praise

2008-02-09T11:11:00.001-08:00

I have always been a journal-keeper. It started with a beautiful little red floral fabric book my mom bought me when I was about 7. Followed by a Strawberry Shortcake locking diary, and various notebooks with beautiful covers through high school and college. After graduating, I moved to blank books (instead of lined) because I was so inspired by the art journals of Teesha Moore. (She is such an amazing, creative genius! She deserves her own post- another day.)Sadly, I never loved my own art journal pages as much as I love Teesha's, but keeping an art journal is a lot cheaper than therapy. (And more fun, I should imagine.)
Now, since becoming a mother, I'm sad to say my journaling habit has really suffered. I still write, but my entries are in a dozen different places now: in a notebook, on the computer, on the back of a church bulletin, etc. I have vowed to myself that one of these days I WILL print/tear out/gather them all into one binder.
I find it rather ironic that the memories that will be the most precious to me in my old age(mothering my young children) are the ones that rarely are recorded. I have done some scrapbook-style memory keeping, but just haven't found time for it in the last two years.
So, this morning, I was looking for a certain Word file on the computer and came across this journal entry I typed well over a year ago during a few stolen moments. It spoke to me, and I thought it might speak to you.
Here it is:
October 4, 2006
As a teacher, I have always known about the power of praise to get kids to do what you want them to do. But I never considered its power in my own life. Lately, I have really felt the uplifting and encouraging power of a kind word spoken in my direction. Last week, a girl from my playgroup watched me interact with Sister at My Gym while toting Brother in the Baby Bjorn. After about 40 minutes she looked at me and remarked (with true admiration in her eyes), "Wow! You do such a great job with two of them!" I was startled and thrilled. I have not thought of myself as doing great with two- I have thought of myself as surviving with two. To hear her say that really encouraged my heart.
It happened again today at playgroup. A new mom, Kimberly, was asking me about how difficult it was with two. As we were talking, she kept making statements like, "I’m amazed that you can be so upbeat even though you’re still getting up with your baby in the night." and "Your daughter isn’t in preschool? You’re a tough woman! I’d be begging to drop one of them off somewhere!" She too was being genuine in her praise, and it felt so good to hear. Because I AM trying to be upbeat even though I’m tired, and I DID make a conscious decision that preschool isn’t right for Sister at this time even though it would be a lot easier for me.
So, I write this journal entry to remember these moments; not only because they uplift me but so that I never forget the power of a kind word in another person’s life. Moms work hard and are largely unrecognized for what we do. After all, it all seems so mundane. Change the diapers. Run errands. Prepare meals. Entertain our kids. Clean the house. At face value, it doesn’t seem all that worthy of praise. And yet, we deserve some recognition and appreciation for what we do- it’s of the upmost importance!
I’m going to mindfully practice praising my fellow mommies from now on. I know it will be as much a blessing in their lives as it was in mine.
------
I'm going to praise at least 3 mommies I know this week with a hand-written note. (One is my S-I-L, one is a woman who faithfully brings her 3 young kids to church every week by herself -Dad won't come, and one is just a friend who I also think is a great mom.) Can you think of a mommy in your life to encourage this week?

One more thing- a recipe for you that is so yummy on a cold day!
Slow Cooker Turkey Chili
(from the kitchen of the ultra-healthy Sister-In-Law)
Makes 6 servings
Ingredients:
1 1/4 lb. Lean ground turkey
1 large onion, chopped
1 garlic clove, minced
1 ½ cups frozen corn kernels
1 red bell pepper, chopped
1 green bell pepper, chopped
1 (28 oz.) Can crushed tomatoes
1 (15 oz.) Can black beans, rinsed and drained
1 (8 oz) can tomato sauce
1 (1.25 oz) package chili seasoning mix
½ tsp salt
Toppings: shredded cheese (Colby and Monterey Jack blend)
Directions:
1. Cook first 3 ingredients in large skillet over medium high heat, stirring until turkey crumbles and is no longer pink. Spoon mixture into a slow cooker; stir in corn and next 7 ingredients until well blended. 2. Cook at high 4 to 5 hours or at low 6 to 8 hours. Serve with desired toppings. Yummy with tortilla or Frito chips!

Envy my mental energy

2008-02-08T10:58:00.000-08:00

Last night I enjoyed a phone conversation with one of my favorite people: my Grandma. We were talking about my sister-in-law (known hereafter as SIL) and how self-disciplined and fit and healthy she is. And it's true. She runs 4 or 5 times per week, eats very healthy foods, does like 100 sit-ups every morning... hey! As I write this I am amazed that we get on so well. Disciplined runner-types who start the day with sit-ups and eat big bowls of salad at every meal aren't usually my type of pal. But my SIL is a saint; truly one of the sweetest, kindest Christian women you will meet, so I tolerate the excessive helathiness. Anyway, Grandma was going on and on about what a wonder SIL is and how she keeps such a neat little figure and how she's lost every ounce of that baby weight. I agreed completely, and then Grandma went silent for a moment (very rare indeed.) Finally, she said, "Well, dear, and you have so much mental energy!"
HA! HA!
I started laughing really hard, "Well, thanks Grandma! Nobody has ever given me that compliment before!"
She started stammering and justifying it, "Well, it's true! You write all those grants and you have so many ideas. It takes a lot of energy to do that!"
I agreed so she could be off the hook. It's just too bad that mental energy doesn't help you lose weight and stay in shape, or I'd put that SIL to shame. And if only this mental energy of mine could do the laundry or clean up the 1 gazillion toys that are littering my den floor...
But maybe you can get a glimpse of my hulking mental energy on this blog.
Mental energy. Ha!

I will leave you with a few blog entries I have enjoyed this week:
Andrea has some yummy-looking recipes for homemade salad dressing (get to it, mental energy!)
Holly gives tips on how to manage life with young children. She has 8 (yes, 8) kids, but the tips are helpful for someone with even one measly ol' little kid.
Meg is doing a month of puppets. (I have a thing for puppets. More on that another day.) This one is especially beautiful and doable.
This blog is just right up my alley. Artful parenting? Sign me up!

OK, my mental energy needs some Gatorade before the kiddies wake up. Gotta go ice down the old brain. They say using too much mental energy is just as bad as using none at all.
Sorry- I just can't help myself!

thanks Beck! and a book recommendation

2008-02-07T11:29:00.001-08:00

Well.
If you're reading this chances are that you found me via the QUEEN of Canadian family blogs - Beck. Beck suspects we may be long-lost twins, and if that were found to be true, it would confirm my childhood suspicions that I did in fact have a sister whom my parents traded for my brother. (Wanting a boy and all that rot.) Beck, are you also a princess of a small and unknown, yet incredibly wealthy, country? Because I was always convinced that I was one of those too.
Anyway, thanks for visiting my little blog, and thanks a million for the shout-out, Beck!

Lately, when I've had five minutes here or there to read, I've been reading Mitten Strings for God: Reflections for Mothers in a Hurry by Katrina Kenison. I will admit that I approached this book warily. I admire mothers of all kinds and respect that there are many approaches to parenting. I have strong opinions about how I parent and what is right for my family, but that doesn't mean that I think other people with different approaches are wrong. (Unless they are the parents of the child who sat next to me in a restaurant last week and who was an ABSOLUTE TERROR.) But in general, I think this parenting thing is really very hard and we all do the best we can and don't need to give each other crap.
Having said that, I will say that I am always rather skeptical about some of the newer-age approaches to parenting. (While also finding bits and pieces that I think are brilliant about those approaches.) At first glance, I thought Mitten Strings For God was going to be a little too far out for me. I looked at the chapters titled things like, "Peace" and "Rhythm" and "Healing" and thought I had bought a lemon. (Actually, a lemon scented incense stick.) Now having read several chapters, I think it is the best parenting book I have ever read.
Kenison's writing voice is encouraging, entertaining, and authentic. She doesn't demand that I mother my children in a certain way, she just gently pushes me toward being the mother I am, only better. Hers is not a book of activities, but after I read it for a while my head is spinning with ideas. It is the kind of book I will keep on my nightstand and reread frequently. I highly recommend it. If anyone else has a parenting book that really impacted them and helped them to be a better parent, please say so in the comments.
"In stillness, we find our peace. Knowing peace at home, we bring peace into the world."- Katrina Kenison

Book list and a mini-rant

2008-02-04T17:39:00.001-08:00

Mini-rant first:

Last night my husband and I enjoyed watching the Superbowl together. I am a football fan, but usually the Superbowl is a let-down. Not this year! It was a great game: lots of fun to watch.

Unfortunately, I also had to watch a man on fire plunge himself into water, a different man freaking out in what looked like a police station room (punching the wall and throwing furniture around), a man being very scary and intimidating a woman, and a firefighter desperately trying to perform CPR on what obviously was a dead woman while his peers watched. Oh, I almost forgot the most memorable one- a woman lying on a table with a drill going into her skull.

So, from where did all these lovely and restful bedtime images spring?

COMMERCIALS. Freaking commercials.

Apparently the networks think that by showing us these thrilling and "enticing" little clips of their regular network shows, we will make sure to tune in at showtime.

Pardon my French, but what the hell is going on?

When did this type of imagery become OK for primetime viewing?

We don't watch that much TV anymore, but I have been noticing the inappropriate nature of commercials more and more. It really hit me last Thanksgiving, when I was trying to watch the Macy's Day Parade with Sister. Parades are right up her alley, and I just knew that she'd get a thrill from the floats, balloons, marching bands, etc.

It was a BIG ZONK. We found ourselves either watching a seemingly endless stream of scary/sexy commercials, or listening to talking heads TELL us about the parade while it passed behind them, or watching Al Roker interview some of NBC's prime time stars who were at the parade (so they could plug their shows) while the parade passed behind them, or were seeing a Broadway musical number (the only thing worth watching.) And most of the commercials were TOTALLY INAPPROPRIATE for family audiences. One that stands out in my memory was for the big hit show, "Heroes," where teenaged protaganists were doing all kinds of thing that were "thrilling" like leaping from buildings or creating fireballs and explosions or engaging in hand-to-hand combat. Just the type of thing I wanted my 3-year old to see on Thanksgiving morning.

After about 30 minutes we turned the blasted thing off. (What took me so long?)

People, I'm over it.

Now I'm not quite ready to put my TV on the curb with yesterday's poopie diaper. But I'm getting closer every day.

I'll wrap up this mini-rant (not so mini...sorry) for now, but I will revisit this. Mamas, we've got to do something. I mean, what if I had an 8 year old Brother instead of a 1 year old Brother who wanted to watch some football with his Daddy? What would I do then?
Ay, Carumba!

On another note, Beck- here are some book recommendations for you. Sorry there aren't more- it's been hectic around here with my grant-writing work. Here are some books that any self-respecting library should keep on the shelves:

For kids:

Fancy Nancy and the latest Fancy Nancy and the Posh Puppy - Sister LOVES these

Pssst! by Adam Rex

Knuffle Bunny and the latest Knuffle Bunny Too by Mo Willems

First the Egg by Laura Seeger

Rainstorm- very cool wordless picture book

The Little Red Fish by Tae-Eun Yoo

For older kids and adolescents:

The Wednesday Wars by Gary Schmidt

Good Masters! Sweet Ladies! Voices from a Medieval Village by Laura Amy Schlitz

Others by Laura Amy Schlitz that are good are A Drowned Maiden's Hair and The Hero Schliemann: The Dreamer Who Dug for Troy

Oops, out of time. I'll try to post a few more this week.

new friends visiting the sand box

2008-02-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Did you know that $1.99 spent at Target for a tube of plastic turtles and frogs can buy a lot of backyard fun? I was trying to spice up the sandbox a little bit (it worked!) but eventually our little plastic friends decided that they wanted to go explore in the yard too.
I try to stay away from the plastic stuff more and more, but when you're talking about sandboxes and outdoor play, plastic is still in consideration. Grateful today that the thermometer is starting to rise again. Please don't be jealous, northern friends. I'll pay for it in July when it's 100 degrees!

My only regret was not buying two tubes of critters. Sharing these was really hard for my children. Sister, especially. You'd think that being 3 and 1/2 she'd do better with the sharing thing than Brother. But it seems Sister is going through a little hoarding stage lately. Thursday at playgroup I found her sitting on the floor clutching all the dolls and princess finery she could get her little hands on. She didn't play with it, she just held it. It was rather amusing, and since the other kids (mostly boys) didn't want it, I let it go. Later I asked her what her best part of the day was. Her reply?

"When I hog-ded the dolls." Yes, the DH has taught her to say "hogged" as in "Are you hogging all the toys?"

We're real classy people.

winning is fun!

2008-02-02T16:38:00.000-08:00

And the winner is...Deanne! Hooray! Deanne, I will be emailing you your Amazon.com gift certificate in the next 24 hours. Congratulations!

As you see, we did use the potty. Sister was pretty puzzled by the whole thing but she played along nicely. And I received quite a lecture from the DH about statistics and probability and my method. I told him to be quiet- he was making my head hurt. Math is such a nasty thing. If I want to give away my prize in a statistically biased manner, I will. (But next time I'll use a random number generator like everyone else!)

And guess what... I WON SOMETHING! And yes, it was the CUPCAKE TOTE! I am beside myself. I never win cool stuff like this. So, thanks Jessica!

469 names in the potty

2008-02-02T10:43:00.001-08:00

All is on hold while I write 469 names on tiny pieces of paper and put them in Sister's potty for a drawing...
Not.
Sorry, gang, but I just don't have the time. Never in my wackiest dreams did I think that 469 people would enter my little contest. BUT, I do think the potty should still be involved. Sister too.
So, I am going to do it a little differently. Sister is going to draw numbers out of the potty.
First, she will draw from three slips of paper that say either "one digit number" "two digit number" or "three digit number."
That will narrow it down.
Then she will draw numbers 0 to 9 (depending on how many digits from the first drawing.)
That should give me my winner.
We will do all of this after naptime today and I'll report back here.
And if you don't like how I'm doing it, sorry. You'll just have to report me to the Bureau of Blog Giveaways, Contests, and Related Nonsense.

Excuse me while I vent for a moment

2008-01-31T11:44:00.000-08:00

I need to confess.
A few afternoons ago the DH took the kids to the grocery store. I am working on a freelance writing project in my "spare time" (insert hysterical laughter here) and am desperate for even a few moments to write in peace. (Don't get excited- it's grant writing for a non-profit. Not exactly a creative writing adventure.)
Anyway, I called DH to tell him something I forgot to add to the list. When he answered, he sounded stressed out. When I asked why, he snapped, "The kids are fussy, Brother keeps finding ways to escape the seat, even though I strap him in, and I'm having to carry him all over the store. This isn't exactly easy!"
Now, I am actually proud of the way I responded. I said, "I'm sorry you are having a hard time. I'll let you go. Thanks for shopping for me!"
But as soon as I hung up I felt this immense wave of pleasure knowing that the DH was getting a small glimpse of this job called "Stay-At-Home-Mom."
My DH is wonderful, and he's a hands-on Dad, and I know he values my role as our kids' mom. BUT, I also know that he just doesn't get it sometimes. For instance, yesterday afternoon, when he called to say that he wouldn't be home at 4:00 as promised- it would be 5:00. And then when he called at 5:00 to say it would be a little later. And then when he got home at 6:30 and was surprised to find me a little, let's say, unhappy.
Or when he acts like he's not sure why the house is such a mess- after all, we were home all day.
(That's WHY it's a mess, Daddy-O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
So, just knowing that he was getting a taste of the grocery store adventure with two young children was a little gratifying. Even better was when he came home with two pounds of sliced deli ham instead of turkey as requested. Oops. He looked crestfallen. "Sorry, I guess I just misread the list. I mean, the kids had already finished their cookies, and they were really fussy, and it was crazy..." I just patted his shoulder and said, "It's OK. I understand."
I understand all too well.

Boy, that feels better. To make up for this vent, I'll post another day about what a sweet husband DH is, and what a GREAT Dad he has been, and how hard-working he is, and smart, and handy around the house.
Just not today.

A little paint

2008-01-30T10:50:00.000-08:00

I have learned that when my kids are quarrelsome, cranky, or simply not in the mood for anything else, some paint and water will save the day. They never tire of painting. I think we could paint six hours per day and they'd still ask for more.

And, slowly, I'm getting easier and easier about the mess. (Read carefully- the mess isn't getting easier- I am.) I just breathe and surround them with an army of damp paper towels. It's well worth a little mess to see the beautiful art they create, and the beautiful smiles on their faces.

And here's a friendly little tip. Did you know that watercolors are even more fabulous when a dropper is part of the mix? This was fun- and is leading to an outdoor art activity with droppers, ice trays full of tinted waters and lots of thick paper. Only waiting for a warm day!

2008-01-29T11:10:00.000-08:00

I have realized that I am a rather verbose blogger. No Earnest Hemingway here.

See, there- I said the same thing twice in two different ways.

It's not my fault, though. It's a genetic disorder inherited from my dear old Dad. Every time he comes over to have me type a letter, I shudder. It's never less than 4 handwritten legal pad pages. Never.

Love him, though. Other than the verbose thing, he's the best.

And fortunately, it's only a problem in written form.

Had some fun yesterday with the good old homemade dough. Recipe is 4 C flour, 1 C salt, and 1 and 3/4 cups warm water. FYI- this makes quite a bit of dough. I could have halved it (and saved 2 C flour) and still had plenty for two kids. The only problem was that we made beads, only to have the holes swell shut as it dried. So, we'll have to try a different dough for beads, I suppose.

On another note, here is a list of some of the things I hope to win via the Bloggy Giveaways contest.

1. Smurf Paperdolls

2. Mastercard gift card

3. Barbies

4. Angelina Ballerina books

5. an MP3 player

6. a cupcake tote bag

I'm just getting started. And it looks like my contest for the $15 Amazon card has slightly more than 2 players. (!!!!!!!)

Finally, here's a little something that's bringing us some joy today. While unpacking, we found our felt sets. These are officially called "Felt Tales" sets, but called "felties" around here. The first set we ever owned, the fairies, got us through a 14 hour car trip without a peep from Sister. Did you catch that? NOT A PEEP in 14 hours. Was it the best $18.99 I ever spent? You'd better believe it.

Prize time!

2008-01-28T18:46:00.001-08:00

I just stumbled upon something that is guaranteed to eat up a LOT OF MY TIME in the next few days. Have you found it yet? It's the Bloggy Giveaways Carnival! Oh, the prizes!!! So, I'll play too. Anyone who reads my blog and leaves a comment this week, prior to Friday, Feb.1 at 8:00 pm will be eligible to win a $15 Amazon.com e-gift certificate. WOO HOO!
Beck, faithful commenter of mine, do you want a $15 Amazon.com gift certificate? :-)
Of course, I will be fair and everyone (all two of you) will have a shot. I will write your names on tiny little pieces of paper and let Sister pull one out of her training potty.
So, do leave a comment and take a shot at this FABULOUS PRIZE!
And then, leave the dishes in the sink and run right over to the Bloggy Giveaways site where you can find 500 (!) other bloggers offering prizes this week.
Go! Go now!

Life lessons from Cinderella

2008-01-27T10:39:00.000-08:00

Have any of you other mamas out there ever realized that you pushed your child into an activity or "first time" experience because it was something you wanted, only later to realize that they weren't ready at all? That you pushed them toward something that wasn't appropriate for their age and stage?

Oh, woe is me, because that is exactly what I have done.

A while back I introduced Sister to her first Disney movie: Cinderella. She was already quite familiar with the Disney princesses from books and dolls and what-not. (Can any child who walks through Target, Wal-Mart, etc. escape Disney's merchandising?) And I LOVE Cinderella. I love the story, and the movie(s) and the dress, and everything. Anyway, I decided that perhaps Sister was ready for a full-length feature full of princess clothes and magical moments and happy endings. And at first I thought I was right. She loved it.

But from the very first viewing, she seemed quite disturbed by the "mean girls" who rip Cinderella's dress. I used my best Mommy voice to explain that those girls are indeed mean, but it's OK because, Look! The fairy godmother makes her an even more beautiful dress!

The problem is, she can't let it go. And now she's started begging to watch the movie only to burst into tears during the dress ripping scene. Poor baby.

I, in my worldly, jaded adulthood perceived that movie as having zero violence. I thought that it would be just perfect for my three-year old. I saw that scene as dramatic, and even somewhat comical. I never imagined it through a child's innocent eyes.

But let's think- here is poor Cinderella living in a house with three hateful women, doing their bidding all day long. And here comes an invitation to a ball... Cinderella is so excited! And here are the mice and the birds (her only friends) sewing their little hearts out and risking their lives to collect beads and finery for the dress. And here is Cinderella, so awed and thankful for the remade dress (once her dead mother's) running down the stairs full of hope and joy to be going to the ball too. And here are the nasty sisters, mean girls indeed, tearing at the dress like a pack of hyenas, shredding all of Cinderella's hopes and dreams.

No wonder Sister cries. I feel like crying now, too.

Of course, there is ultimately a happy ending. But what I have realized is that in offering this movie what I have actually done is show Sister that people like the step-sisters exist. And they're out there waiting for you- ready to shred your dreams.

The interesting thing is how Sister is dealing with it. In the last two weeks I have noticed her doing a lot of role-playing. She will declare that she is her teacher, or a princess, etc. and pretend play. Well, lately she has taken to being a "mean girl" and she will pretend to reach out and rip at my clothes.

When this first happened I wasn't sure what to do. Should I reprimand her? Should we have a little chat about being nice vs. being mean?

Then I remembered an experience from my first years of teaching school. That year there had been a widely publicized disaster that was all over the news- on TV constantly. The kids were abuzz about it and we had spent a large bit of time talking it over in class. On that day we were out on the playground at recess, and suddenly I realized a large group of my kids were "playing pretend" about this disaster. Some of them were pretending to be injured, others pretending to be doctors and nurses, etc. One child was even pretending to be fire and was going around "burning" the "victims." I was rather horrified, and jumped up to go give them a severe lecture about showing respect and being appropriate and playing civilized games. But then an older, experienced teacher standing next to me put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Let 'em be, honey." I was shocked. She could tell. She went on to explain that this was how children dealt with strong feelings and situations they didn't understand and that it would be OK and actually help them. Just leave them alone.

I sat there and watched the children try to make sense of the senseless. And lo and behold, "Mr. Fire" suddenly morphed into "Mr. Fireman" who was helping the burn victims, and over the course of the next 10 minutes, each victim was taken to the "hospital area" (flat piece of grass under a tree) and tended to by the nurses. And when I rang the bell to line up, they all ran to the door, happy and laughing and care-free. I whispered to the master teacher, "Should I talk about this with them when we get back to class?" She just smiled a wise smile and said, "No. They're just fine. Get to math."

So last night when Sister came up to me and said, "Hey, Mommy! I a mean girl!" and made a horrible face and pretended to rip my clothes, I collapsed to the ground and wept into my hands. "Oh! I'm so sad! The mean girl just ripped my beautiful dress!" Sister watched me carefully for a moment, and then broke into a radiant smile. "Mommy! Now I Cinderella and you the fairy godmother! Fix my dress!"

And I did.

I've learned a valuable parenting lesson through this little experience. I will be much more careful about the images sister sees, and what she watches on TV, and even the stories we read. I don't want her to be too sheltered, but I also don't want to push her into the quicksand of this world either. It's a balance, for sure- one I'll be much more careful to keep.

Mudballs: A yummy toddler snack

2008-01-25T11:00:00.000-08:00

In my quest to help Sister become a better eater, I have tried letting her help me cook as a way to make the food more appealing. So far, so good. She has already "cooked" and eaten oatmeal, a spoonful of veggie soup (hey- at least she tasted it!) and a new snack favorite called Mudballs. I found the recipe in Trish Kuffner's book, The Toddler Busy Book. I am a sucker for this genre of parenting book that promises lots of creative ideas and activities for toddlers, and usually am disappointed. Seriously, how can an author fill a book with highly UNoriginal "activities" like, "paint with water on the driveway" or "take a trowel to the sandbox and let your toddler dig" and get published?
Anyway, The Toddler Busy Book has enough creative and original ideas to be a keeper. (Though if I were you I'd try to check it out at the library before I bought it.)
Anyway, the kids had a lot of fun making the Mudballs and ate gobs of them. And, the mudballs are pretty healthy, too. (At least healthier than a cookie!)

Mudballs

1 cup peanut butter
1/4 cup honey
1/2 cup dry powdered milk
1/2 cup raisins
Crushed Graham crackers (we used about 1/4 pack) You can increase if the mixture is too sticky.
Chocolate milk powder

1. Mix all ingredients together in a medium size bowl. (Except chocolate powder.)
2. Form the mixture into small balls.
3. Place a small amount of chocolate milk powder on a plate and roll the balls in the powder.
4. Eat as a tasty snack or refrigerate and eat later.

Notes: In order to crush the graham crackers, I put them into zip-lock bags and gave one baggie to each kid. They had great fun smashing the crackers into crumbs. I had one too, and every few minutes I'd call out "Switch!" so I could make sure all the crackers got crushed fine.
Also, I quickly found that it was very important to make very small balls with my kids because they would put whole mudballs in their mouths and peanut butter can be a choking hazard if you're not careful.
Also, my kids had trouble forming the balls but my three-year old enjoyed rolling them in the chocolate powder. We formed a little assembly line and had great success.
Finally, I will warn you that these are not pretty. They will not be an appetizing treat to set out at, say, your PTA's father-daughter dance. But they taste pretty darn good!

Indoor fun on a cold day

2008-01-23T10:49:00.000-08:00

It's always interesting to see the way a toy can become new again with the slightest addition of novelty. Sister's dollhouse (mine from childhood- handed down) has been sitting in the corner of the family room for over three weeks, untouched. Both she and Brother walk past it a hundred times each day and if I suggest playing with it, they dismiss me and sneer at it the next time they pass by.

So, in a fit of cleaning for a visit from my mother-in-law, I slid it across the room and put it beside the couch.

Did you know that a dollhouse placed beside a couch becomes the most fascinating thing in the world? They have played with it for hours since.

At one point, Sister had great fun placing the dolls in the window so they could "see the new house." Then she decided that they should be photographed.

This is her new thing. She'll be busy playing and will suddenly decide that her play is worthy of photo documentation. "Mama- take a picture of this!" she will call. I think the instant gratification of the digital camera really appeals to her.

The other game that was really fun could be titled "Let's cram as much crapola as possible into the dollhouse." This game, happily, was fun for both Sister and Brother. She was able to use her furniture arranging skills and he was able to use his hunting dog "fetch and carry" skills. I sat in Sister's room and handed Brother little toys to take to Sister. He would run as fast as he could to her out in the den, at which point she would say very prettily, "Thank you Brother!" Then he would race back to me for the next item. We spent a good 30 minutes this way, and Brother burned some energy- always a good thing.

So, if you are trapped indoors and you have a dollhouse, try moving it to an unexpected spot or decorating it with unconventional things. It might help you through a long afternoon.

PS- Ariel's Grotto still under construction.

2008-01-22T11:47:00.001-08:00

No big fat story today. Just excited about:

1. Molly's swap. What a cool idea to do a swap for and by the kids! I think we're going to have a lot of fun with this.

2. Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith. Yes, I am a fan. I have always liked the Star Wars flicks but hadn't made time to watch the last one (where Anakin becomes Darth Vader.) So, we Netflixed it and it was TOTALLY AWESOME. I've been going around the house doing light saber moves and saying things like, "Fix your toast, I will, young Jedi." The DH looked at me this morning and said, "Um, you are such a dork." To which I tartly retorted, "Takes one to know one." So there. Not dorky at all.

3. The kids are finally sleeping at night (for the most part.) Whew. Still working on the eating, though.

OK. I've fully taxed my blogging skills for today. May the force be with you.

Ariel's Grotto- Part 1

2008-01-21T07:38:00.000-08:00

So the other night after enduring two nights of Sister crying every ten minutes from 8:30 until 10:00 PM (Mommy, help! There is a cat under my bed!.... Mommy! Mommy! A giant is coming to get me! Etc.) I bought her a night-light, tucked her in and gave her a little pep-talk about how Daddy and I protect her at night, how God watches over her, how there is nothing to be scared of, etc. Then I casually said something like, “And if you do a good job tonight and go to sleep without fussing, maybe I’ll get you a little treat at the store.” Really, that was just a thoughtless little whisper. She was already lying down, and probably didn't even hear me.

Well, miracle of miracles, we had a great night! Didn’t hear a peep out of her until the next morning when she calls out, “Mommy! I had a great night! I ready to go to the store!”
“Um, what??” Note to self: Playing dumb with a 3-year old doesn’t work.
She was very persistent. “I did good sleepin’! You take me to the store now!”
Me and my big mouth. I’m sure the night-light would have done the trick. Why did I add the bribe? I’ve GOT to stop doing that! My parenting philosophy does not include bribing my children to do things with material rewards! And yet, I find myself saying these things in desperation, and then I’ve got to honor my word.

Sheesh.
So, next thing I know, we’re driving down the road to Target. (She was convinced that I had told her we could go to Target.) And the whole way, I’m giving her little speeches about how we’re only going to get a small treat, like a piece of candy, and she needs to be a good sleeper from now on, etc. Yeah- I’m on a great parenting binge, here.
Thirty minutes later she walks out of Target clutching a brand new Glitter Disney Princess Ariel doll to her chest, a huge smile on her face. But wait! Before you injure yourself with your eye rolling, let me explain.
Once we got in the store, I just didn’t have the heart to wheel her over to the candy aisle. I simply can’t push tooth-rotting junk candy on my child. So we wandered around the store, looking for something fabulous (in her mind) and cheap (in my mind) and hopefully without lead paint (impossible to tell, of course.) In reality, such an item does not really exist. As we walked past the toy department (I really didn’t intend to buy her a toy) she saw the glitter princess display on an end-cap and they were on sale. "Only" $7.00. She fell in love, and I couldn’t resist. So much for a small treat. But honestly, does a 3-year old really understand the difference between a $1.00 piece of candy and a $7.00 doll? In her economy, they are both “treats.”
So, to make up for all that crappy parenting, I thought that at least we could have some hands-on art time and make a creative home for Ariel.

Now, I have not yet been bold enough to use real Tempera paint during our crafting time ever since Brother got mobile. But all you artsy-craftsy blogging mamas have inspired me, and I decided that one of the main reasons we rented this house was because it was so “lived-in” and child-friendly. Time to bust out the paint!
I got one of our moving boxes, cut off the flaps, and set it on the middle of a vinyl tablecloth with a bowl of blue paint and three brushes. The goal was to paint our “ocean box” so we could decorate it later when the paint dried.
I guess I’ll say it went well. But, man, can a 19-month old make some mess with paint! 5 minutes into our painting I had to strip off Brother's clothes. 15 minutes into it he was covered. I just kept taking deep breaths and telling myself, “This will clean up. This will clean up. Relax. This will clean up.”
By the time we had finished there was blue paint on the splat mat, on every piece of clothing we were wearing, on the floor, and all over Brother. I mean, ALL OVER Brother! (The photo doesn't show the ENORMOUS GLOB right between his eyes!) But I’m glad I did it. These are the kinds of experiences I want my kids to have, mess or no mess.
And Sister had a blast. She did so great painting the box- and telling me all the things she was going to put inside. “Fish! And a treasure box! And a bed! And a farm!” A farm? OK- whatever.

I feel sorry for her sometimes because she's so ready for these art experiences, but I hold her back because of Brother. He's just such a mess! It makes me wonder how Amanda does it with her tribe of younglings. Maybe her book will explain.

I’ll post again and let you see the finished product.

found: camera cord + two words to live by

2008-01-20T11:12:00.000-08:00

Thank goodness. My DH found the camera cord. Guess where? In the dollhouse. Oh, of course.

So here is the proof of our venture into the yard- and some glimpses of the yard itself. I think, come spring, we'll have some sunshiney fun out there.

This yard just screams Neverland and Fairy Garden to me. Maybe even a dinosaur park. Hmmm... lots of ideas floating around this pea-head of mine. There is one big dirt pit in the back corner where the owner pulled out a pond. It was pretty cool- rocks on the bank, a little bridge, and some fish. The kids were enthralled- a little too enthralled. I just couldn't stop thinking about what could happen if one of the kids got away from me for a moment, if I got distracted, etc. It only takes a few inches of water and a split second for the unthinkable to occur.

Apparently the owner was having the same thoughts, and when he asked us if it was OK if he dismantled the pond, we were thrilled. He says he's going to come put in a "secret garden" back there. Sounds cool.

In fact, this yard would be perfect if it wasn't for the nasty dogs that run along the back fence and bark like they are demented. One is a golden retriever and the other is a lab mix. Now, I'm a dog person. I like dogs, and dogs almost always like me. But when I attempted to befriend these dogs, they tried to come over the fence at me.

We haven't met their owners yet, and I'm a little at a loss now because I want to get off to a good start with our backyard neighbors but I also feel the need to comment about the dogs. Something like, "Hi! Nice to meet you! Could you get rid of your dogs?" or "Hello- you have a lovely home. Let me ask you something- do you mind if I mace your dogs?"

It's a problem.

On another note:

I went to church today in a foul mood. Lately DH and I have to attend separate services because Brother FREAKS OUT when we drop him at the nursery and they always end up paging us to come get him after about 15 minutes. Then, one of us (me) spends the rest of the service walking him around the halls. Just a lovely spiritual experience.

So, DH goes to the 9:00, I go to the 11:00. The kids don't go at all. It is definitely not ideal, but I keep telling myself it's just for a "season" of life. In fact, I'm going to start taking Sister with me in a few weeks because she'll finally be old enough to attend children's church.

Anyhoo, I wasn't in the mood today. The kids were whiny all morning, I was scolding them every 5 seconds, and simultaneously trying to brown a roast and make gravy so I could get the crock pot going. Then Brother climbed a piece of furniture he has been forbidden from climbing, fell off and bonked his head, and cried hysterically. While I tended him, the roast started to burn. You know how it goes.

So when DH came home, I almost drove to the bookstore for some relaxation instead of to church. (Naughty thoughts!) But I didn't. I went to church. And boy was I glad, because at the end of an average sermon, a woman got up and spoke about her battle with terminal cancer, and how she's not afraid to die but that she is very sad to leave her husband and children and grandchildren and how she wishes that she could see them all get married and be there for their big days but that every experience she's had with the Lord thus far has been pretty awesome and that she trusts him with her death as much as she trusts him with her life. Whew. Yes, I cried. (Everyone cried.)

And she said one more thing that really stuck with me. She said that when she found out she had a year to live, her husband asked her what she wanted to do. Travel? Try something new she had always longed to try?

Her answer was no, she just wanted to do exactly what she had been doing. She said, "I've lived a life with no regrets, and if my tomorrow is the same as my yesterday, that's just fine with me."

No regrets.

And I sat there regretting my bad mood, and my cross words to my children this morning.

Ali invites everyone to start the new year with a word that they will live by. I have two.

a happy surprise and a yummy recipe

2008-01-19T10:45:00.000-08:00

So last night I decided to log in to Blogger and tweak something on my blog's toolbar. I was surprised to see that someone had left me a comment! Since I only just started this blog, and haven't "advertised" it at all, I thought it was going to be a long time before anyone left a comment here. I was curious (and suspected a family member) but when I clicked the comment and saw who it was from I almost fell out of the chair. It was from Beck. BECK! My #1 favorite blogger of all time! The one person I obsessively read every day! I won't go on and on, because I already did that in an email to her and she'll think I'm a total wacko, but let me just say that it was quite a little thrill and if I never get another comment I don't care.
Thanks again, Beck!

OK, gushing over.

I have some nice photos of my kids' little venture into the winter yard yesterday, but I can't find the #!$*&! cord that connects the camera to the computer. I swear, it takes me just forever to recover from a move. So, those will have to wait until I find (or buy) the cord.

But, let me do at least one useful thing in this post.
For Christmas my husband asked for a cookbook by Giada de Laurentiis (the gorgeous Italian girl who also has a cooking show.) I bought it for him (and wrote a note inside telling him to keep his eyes on the recipes, not on the cleavage.) But while I was at the bookstore, I also saw another cookbook by a TV-famous Italian woman, Lidia Matticchio Bastianich. Now, Lidia is older and not as gorgeous, but her cookbook looked much better. So, I bought it too. Good decision!
Yesterday I was looking for a dinner recipe that was easy, fast, fairly inexpensive, and appealing to our palates. Yes, a tall order, I know. But I remembered Lidia's cookbook, and decided to try one of her easy recipes for pasta sauce. (She has loads of different suggestions for dressing pastas in this book.)
I went with the Sauce of Marinated Artichoke Hearts and Sun-Dried Tomatoes, and it was terrific! Here's the recipe:

SAUCE OF MARINATED ARTICHOKE HEARTS AND SUN-DRIED TOMATOES
from Lidia's Family Table
Ingredients:
6 Tbsp. extra virgin olive oil
5 plump garlic cloves, sliced
1/2 tsp. dried hot red pepper flakes
2 six-ounce jars (1 and 3/4 cups) marinated artichoke hearts, drained, sliced thin
2/3 cups sun-dried tomatoes, packed in olive oil, drained and sliced into 1/2 inch thin strips
1/2 tsp. salt
1 tsp. grated lemon zest
2 Tbsp. chopped Italian parsley
1/2 cup finely grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese

Instructions:
1. Start cooking the pasta in a large pot of boiling water (salted) 5 minutes before you start the sauce if you are using dry pasta, or just after if using fresh pasta.
2. Pour 4 Tbsp. of olive oil into a big skillet, scatter the garlic slices in, and set the pan over medium high heat. (Important- do not wait until the oil is hot to add the garlic- let garlic heat with the oil.)
3. Toast the roasted red peppers in a skillet "hot spot" for 1/2 minute- stir in with the garlic and oil.
4. Add the sliced artichokes and tomatoes, salt, and lemon zest. Stir well. Cook for about 4 minutes, shaking the pan and tossing the vegetables occasionally, as everything sizzles and juices in the pan thicken. (Doing your best "fancy chef" impression.)
5. Ladle 2 cups of boiling pasta water into the skillet, stir up the sauce, and cook at a perking boil for about 5 minutes, until the liquid is reduced by half.
6. Stir the remaining 2 Tbsp. of olive oil into the sauce. Keep it at a low simmer until the pasta is ready.
7. When the pasta is done almost al dente, scoop it up and into the skillet to finish cooking, adding a bit more pasta water or reducing as necessary. Add the parsley during the initial tossing; off the heat, toss in the cheese just before serving.

Try it, ya'll. It's yummy, and healthy if you use whole-grain pasta (which I have learned to love.)
BTW- I didn't add the red peppers because I was out, and it still tasted great.

Let's Go Outside

2008-01-18T11:05:00.001-08:00

Blah. I hate winter. I have always disliked this time of year. Cold weather is fun around Christmas because it feels festive, but now it just feels cold. It's especially hard with little kids what with all the bundling up and limitations on how long we can stay out in the elements.

I was just thinking that we are missing our outdoors time when I received the January newsletter from the Featherstone Education company. As a former teacher (and current teacher of my babies, thank you) I keep myself abreast of current "education" happenings and info. I found Featherstone when I was teaching kindergarten, and have kept my eye on them ever since. It's a wonderful little company based in England that is focused on early childhood education. Their best products (IMHO) are their "little books." There is the Little Book of Outdoor Play, the Little Book of Treasure Baskets, and the Little Book of Celebrations. (Plus tons of others.) Some are available through Amazon.com- those are the ones I have purchased. I am impressed by the fresh and fun ideas in these books and highly recommend them to others with little ones.
In fact, my new standard birthday present for 1 year olds is a "touch basket" which I read about in the Little Book of Treasure Baskets. The idea is that you fill a basket with tactile things- brushes, swatches of different fabrics, natural objects such as pinecones, shells, and leaves, foil, wax paper, etc. (Of course, careful not to include any choking hazards.) Let me tell you- babies love these things! And so do their parents. It's a nice, creative gift that can occupy a young toddler for quite a while!

Anyway, as I read the editorial by Sally Featherstone, I was struck again by the importance of getting our children out into the world on a daily basis. In fact, that belief was one of the things that prompted us to chose the house we are renting: it has a cool backyard. The guy who owns the house has a green thumb, and he planted the backyard with all kinds of plants that create little hidey-holes and paths throughout the yard. At first glance, I thought, "Ooh- not enough room to run around." But as I considered it further, I realized that the yard we had before, and never enjoyed, was a huge strip of grass. Boring! So I am curious to see how my children respond to this new yard so full of green things and squirrels and secret spots.

This excerpt from the Featherstone newsletter really got me thinking:
"Most boys (and some girls) only really come to life when they are in the garden – able to move with freedom, use their imaginations, stretch their muscles and experience things with all their senses. It is not only their bodies that are stimulated by the combined effects of space, time and freedom, outdoor play actually stimulates the brain to grow.
Ronald Kotulak, in his book ‘Inside the Brain’, says:
“The discovery that the outside world is indeed the brain’s real food is intriguing. The brain gobbles up its external environment in bits and chunks through its sensory system: vision, hearing, smell, touch and taste. Then the digested world is reassembled in the form of trillions of connections between brain cells that are constantly growing or dying, or becoming stronger or weaker, depending on the richness of the banquet.”
And this is particularly true of the natural environment out of doors, and effect that was realised well before the brain research confirmed the instincts of pioneers in early education. Nearly 200 years ago, Friedrich Froebel put the garden at the centre of his philosophy, calling it the Kindergarten (a garden for children), with outdoor and natural experiences at the heart of provision. His work is now reflected in provision across the world, where outdoor play is seen as an essential component of high quality provision in nurseries, daycare and schools.

It's so true, and yet how often do we spend months (even years) planning and designing the interiors of our homes while (almost) totally ignoring our outdoor spaces? It's making me do a lot of thinking about what I want our backyard to be at our next house. It's also making me find the coats, hats and gloves. We're going outside.

Sister, the Terrible Eater

2008-01-17T10:46:00.001-08:00

I have come to a disconcerting realization. Sister, my 3 and 1/2 year old first born delight, has become a picky eater. I didn't think this parenting fate would be mine; at one and a half, Sister ate absolutely anthing you put on her tray with great gusto. Fruits, veggies, eggplant parmasean- it was all good. Then slowly, over the past year or so, foods started to meet with a turned-up nose and proclamation of "I no like it!"
Naturally, green veggies were the first to go. I wasn't too shaken up. I knew that many toddlers went through a stage of refusing green vegetables, and since she ate so much fruit, I wasn't concerned. Fast forward to this week, and Sister's food dislikes have overtaken almost the entire food pyramid. This week the only things she will eat are PB&J, cheese grits (but never cheese by itself!), and pancakes. Oh, and a few fruits- bananas, grapes, pears, and oranges. Thank goodness for that. Of course, she'd eat as many cookies and sweets as I'd give her, but I am not doing much of that.
Regretfully, though, I have found myself doing things I have always thought silly, such as bargaining "If you eat three more bites of supper, you can have a cookie." or demanding "You can't watch your show until you taste the spaghetti." or giving in "She has hardly eaten today! I'll just make her a PBJ and that way we can eat in peace and she won't be hungry."
Yikes!
And has any of it helped? Absolutely not. It's only getting worse. In fact, now even the choice foods are found lacking. "There is too much peanut butter!", a tearful Sister will wail. Or the pancakes are too "crunchy" or the grits "aren't good." It's enough to test the very core of this Mama's patience.
I find myself wondering how much of this behavior has been fueled by the move. Sister has demonstrated a lot of new behaviors since the move- sleeping issues, new fears at nighttime, clingy, whiny behavior, and the worst picky eating we've ever seen. But I guess no matter what the cause, we still have to deal with it.
So, what am I doing? What do I always do when I am faced with a parenting dilemma? Order books! I searched Amazon and found two that looked good. One came yesterday: Feeding the Kids. I skimmed over it and already have some good insights. Number one is to quit making mealtime a battleground. I really already knew that but somehow needed a fresh voice to help me refocus.
So, I think I'll go read now. Future reports on the food wars will be posted here.

2008-01-17T05:28:00.000-08:00

After two weeks, we’re finally getting settled into the rental house. Boy, what a chore moving is for me. I really loathe it. I guess being a global and fairly disorganized person makes the moving process extra difficult for me. As we frantically pack, I am always faced with my piles- here, I’ll inventory one:
2 precious pieces of Sister’s art from preschool
Brother’s nose sucker (he had a nasty cold)
Adorn magazine
Coupon for Ziploc bags
A doll missing its leg (to be fixed)
Doll leg
Teeny tiny rubberband and metal thingy needed to repair doll’s leg
Cookbook I’ve been reading (but not yet cooking from)- by Pat Conroy, a favorite author
Stack of photographs mailed to me from relative
Mail that looks somewhat important but has not yet been opened
Watercolor paint tray
Several paintbrushes
Church bulletin with phone number of friend scrawled on the back
Pottery Barn catalog
Digital camera perched on top of pile (rather precariously)

Are you getting my drift? So, when I move, I am faced with the question: Do I sort and organize all this stuff now, and waste precious packing moments, or do I just throw it all in a box together and worry about it on the other end.

I bet you can guess what I did.
So, here I am- two weeks after the move. I’ve unpacked all the “easy”, straightforward boxes: books- for the shelves, pots and pans- for the kitchen, etc. Now I am faced with a stack of boxes containing the piles. Ugh. Of course, the punishment fits the crime. I am taking my time, getting organized. It won’t last, but it feels good in the moment.

Welcome

2008-01-16T06:42:00.000-08:00

Hi. Welcome to my blog! One might wonder, with all the wonderful blogs that are already out there in the atmosphere, why add my own? Well, why not? I think my biggest motivation is that so many of the blogs I read (mostly by moms about their parenting, crafting, cooking, etc.) give me such a boost, I thought that maybe someday, some mom out there might just get that one little word or idea or spark to get her through a long, rainy afternoon with her little ones. And if that happens, then that is reason enough. So, once again, welcome. I hope you come back again soon!